Author: veeskitchen

Posted in food as therapy...

Think twice before ordering milk dessert from Indian restaurants.

Posted on by veeskitchen

No, it is NOT The Irritable Bowel Syndrome.

*****

My uncle was telling me how when he went with his friends to Kodai, a surgeon friend of his got food poisoned. They were MMC alumni who were staying in a five star hotel in Kodaikanal. All were retired men and there were a few ladies. Since many had health issues, generally bland food was preferred. A particular surgeon thought he would play safe sticking to mere dahi chawal or curd rice. Finally he was the one who got food poisoned at the age of 65. His holiday turned into a nightmare with him getting admitted to a hospital in the hill station for a week. He had to be admitted to ICU as his condition deteriorated before he recuperated. Apparently the culprit was the curd that had been refrigerated for long as there weren’t many takers. Sometimes when you go out, its prudent to eat the hot food that might be heated up lately. That way you can avoid stale food consumption unknowingly. Any fungus in the food may be ruled out. In my case, I have had stomach upsets whenever I consumed milk based desserts in Indian restaurants. Having to share my time between two countries India and Qatar, my body has grown gentle and delicate over years as the food quality standards followed in Qatar are too good. So whenever I am in India, even though I may want to believe that I am immune to the Indian heat and dust and adulterated water, food and environment, I am still affected a little when I try to have my fill whenever I am carried over by the air of festivities. The allure of sweets is too much in India. YOu just cannot say no. As freezers face problems in Indian heat conditions with erratic power supply, the vegetables used in restaurants have to be dipped for a longer time in vinegar to keep them fresh from rotting. For my gentlest stomach therefore eating out regularly means food poisoning sooner or later. A big bout of food poison happened to me at no place other than the Club Mahindra five star restaurant at Coorg. This was unbelievable. I am vegetarian and whenever I am outstation, I pay attention to what i eat. Still some ten years back, I was confined to bed in the resort for a day, having dined on seemingly innocuous vegetarian dish. My family who gorged both on veggie and non veg fare were fine. I investigated the matter with my niece who is a gynecologist presently. She concluded that the vinegar soaking of vegetables must have rumbled my stomach. I started taking note of my restaurant visits after that. I found that the milk based panneer (cottage cheese) proved havoc to me after vegetables. Milk based desserts served in restaurants could do maximum damage. After this Kodaikanal episode of the doctor that can be traced back to the five star kitchen, we can see how preserving food for a longer time extending their shelf life by the restaurants can have a worse effect on our health. I had rabdi, a milky dessert, last evening. Rabdi can be easily put up together I know. Not a big seller. Restaurants here maintain very high hygienic standards. Food inspection is pretty regular in middle eastern countries where even the walking space between tables is regulated so that the restaurants are not cramped. Yet I had food poisoning last night and I threw up everything I ate. What started at 2 am went on until early morning 6 am. I avoid normally the desserts in our restaurants but still went for it when friends ordered. Interestingly and as usual, I was the only one affected. Others got away. Ice creams are fine from fast moving stalls and ice cream counters but again never from restaurants that don’t see consistent orders. Some of us would want to settle for the simple and easily digestible curd rice whenever we go outstation. This post is for them. Hot food is always recommended in restaurants and as far as possible curd rice and any milk based dish must be avoided as the age of the curd or the milk in question cannot be ascertained. There is a risk component. If the curd rice is from a busy popular mess that has no leftovers from previous day, then it is fine. Otherwise we must think twice about ordering milk based dishes and desserts from restaurants. Those with gentle stomach like mine who cannot tolerate vinegar soaked vegetables in gravies, must stick to hot rice menu as far as possible and minimize the subzis if not totally avoid them. For me personally, most restaurants in Doha are fine. Now I am so used to having unadulterated food here that whenever I visit India, it takes time for me to adapt. I do eventually but I play it safe going for steamed food such as idli in that case. Two or three days of continuous restaurant food can totally debilitate me. I still travel a lot within India and in foreign countries. Balancing the food intake is a big challenge for me.

Posted in Socio-Cultural

Pathan

Posted on by veeskitchen

Sometimes, its hard to believe that these Afghans ruled India for a while.

As the Pathan picture gets into controversy, I would like to blog of what I know of Pathans. They are of Af-Pak origin and I have exposure to them in Middle east. Right from the airport you cannot miss them and they are tailormade for some semi skilled professions where they have made their mark. Our locality in gulf is mostly Pathan dominated although the labourers were moved to Labour city with all facilities for them at one spot as the city grew and the world cup preparations were on. I saw a few buildings torn down that were very old and were leased to big pathan groups and obviously the men have moved over to labour city. Otherwise, whichever part of the country you are in, you can find the pathans crouching and huddled together in groups in the traffic islands between busy junctions! Wherever I go for walking, again they would be there as gangs, sharing a common bread. I live in a housing colony where 95% of households are Indian. In fact that’s the reason I wanted to live here. You can opt to live in mixed community but there is the comfort factor. My previous flat was in a largely arab dominated apartment complex where I sincerely could not tolerate the beef smell that would ooze into my home from all directions. See, most people who talk about secularism just cannot understand a vegetarian’s delicate senses. Its not about hate for beef at all. Its that we cannot even stand the smell. I don’t find fault with others’ food habits. Its just my level of tolerance or intolerance that’s all. Moreover, you can be friendly with other nationalities to a certain extent. There are filippinos and arabs among others who are very nice to befriend. But beyond a point, that intimacy that we Indians share can be had only with those from India or with those of Indian origin. I am saying this because, I have instant rapport with Sri lankans, Nepalis even Bhutanese, Bangladeshi and Pakistanis. That kind of closeness I find only with people of the INdian subcontinent.

As for pathans, we find them very handy because they live among us in this locality. I could call them for any plumbing, electrical work or tank cleaning. I wanted Ikea for my kitchen here but when I was in India, my hubby cleverly booked our counters and cabinets from a pathan at throwaway price. Actually the quality is better even if the aesthetics are sacrificed! But my kitchen fittings have been serving me good for over seven years now whereas all the expensive posh Ikea ones that my friends got had to be replaced. There is an exclusive pathan shopping complex near where I live where you can find anything to everything such as nut and bolt and curtain rods to curtains, clothes, winter jackets, boots, fabrics, leather ware etc., etc. And yes even furniture and plumbing, electrical appliances. Rates are okay, and in fact much cheaper. So most of us settle for the pathan stuff as this is not our real home. We are living in rented place. Mine is a 25 year old flat but it is in ship shape except for some minor complaints. Our painting works get done by the pathans. The dry cleaning shops here are run by them. There are a few exceptions though: barber shops have been taken over by Bangladeshis and nobody can beat Indians when it comes to groceries and provisions. There are some restaurants run by pathans and obviously we can’t eat at them. However even the pathans visit our Kerala bhais restaurants to sample Indian food. My street would be flooded by the pathans haphazardly parking their trucks. Yes, mostly they are truck drivers. Or they drive trailers. Before world cup, my area was spruced up. Here nobody questions them. Their lifestyle is part of the community fabric. I miss them now and wonder wherever they went! Now the look of my street is kind of European! The roads are clearly marked and any wayward parking is ruled out. Mysteriously the pathans have disappeared. One reason could be that the free zones left for parking their trailers etc., have been converted into parks and parking bays for the world cup. They have since been closed to easy access. Without parking, the pathans cannot exist. So may be they have moved to wherever they have parking facilities. Some even sleep in their trailers.

The well doing pathans ( khans) are all mostly Indian! But I understand that the labour class pathans are also very rich – some of them, not all. They may be shabbily dressed but they earn handsome from subcontracts. They are in employment of major multinational oil and gas and civil construction and electrical and mechanical companies. They do tough job and get paid very well. I once saw such a pathan hold a family wedding in a star hotel where I went for a speech club program. They seemed out of place but they were real dressed well. Obviously a rich pathan!

But I would always wonder aloud, how simple their life is. They probably own not more than 2 or 3 sets of shalwar kameez. They eat from common thali their bread and biriyani. Beef is very cheap here so they have plenty of it. Their place of worship is everywhere. Their entertainment is gossiping in groups, as I said, huddled together in traffic islands! They go to public parks to access free wi fi to call back home. Their cost of living is way too low. Living conditions not that bad. I believe, most of them don’t even repatriate money to their native countries. They go home once an year to their families, get their wives pregnant and come back happily to resume their life in middle east. By the time their sons may turn 18, you can find them join their fathers. Family business! You need people of all kind to carry on with normal life. so many, many invisible links in the chain that make our life livable. Pathans to me are one such a main connection to comfortable life in middle east even if they are hidden from public view. If you drive down the desert, you can see the old bedouin settlements leased by pathans. Out of nowhere these camps crop up. Their job in the great arabian desert is to rear the camels and tend to other works in the area. Highway drivers to some 99% are the pathans. Nobody can handle trucks and trailers like them! In India, its the Singhs (Punjabis).

Pathans in India are comparatively very well accomplished and doing a great job. Of course not all pathans are blue collar workers. Back in their own countries, they must be prospering in all walks of life. In middle east or anywhere, the Indian domination cannot be ruled out. Indians bulldoze every other nationality frankly with their immense talent pool. We reduce others to middle level or lowest levels of employment and that is what I always think when I see the pathans. But as I said, we need men for every job. Pathans carved their niche in middle east with their tremendous appetite for manual labour and semi skilled jobs. They are best at it and most reliable.

Generally Indian women stay careful with pathans. Not because we fear them. We in middle east have to always keep in mind that we are dealing with men who don’t get a chance to be with women for years sometimes. They don’t booze either. So to be on safe side we are weary of pathans who we engage for all kinds of work at home, that’s all.

One pathan gave me his visiting card knocking on my door telling me he lived just the opposite of our compound and that he was available 24 hrs for carpentry, plumbing, electrical works and house painting, tank cleaning etc., etc. He went door to door giving the card but I was really impressed by the interest he took in his business. The details printed in the card had so many errors still, that was a wonderful effort!

I have a soft corner for the pathans always because they work so hard and they are very contented in their simple lifestyle. My hubby jokes in my previous janam I was a pathan (before 1947) and probably a Kashmiri or Paksitani Hindu (before 1965) who got massacred at the hands of Pakis. So in my present janam I was graced with a birth in proper Hindu dominant India. But my affection for pathans is proof that I have karmic connection with them! Our Indian husbands can be impossible. My hubby would dutifully point out pathans to me wherever we drive and say, ‘look your cousins!’ I would say had I married one of them, my life could have been simplest and happiest! Very few pathans have their families with them in middle east and those who do are considered pretty wealthy. They live here for generations but they are not citizens.

The Khans of India must realize how well placed they are and in fact fortunate that they find themselves in the other side of the border. I would not like to stereotype the pathans but the truth is, the exception is a miniscule percentage. Most have no education but aren’t concerned either! Or may be their sense of righteousness is better than ours. Perhaps their lifestyle is far more peaceful. But then why are their nations so war torn.

Even last evening I went to a pathan shopping place. Almost all shops here are owned by the pathans but the Bangladeshis have been steadily taking over their spots. Except for the truck and/or trailer driving, the Bangladeshis have forayed into every single sphere of the pathan stronghold. They are much smarter, more intelligent and hardworking. Their physical strength cannot match the pathans which is why they have left out the driving of trailers I guess!

Meanwhile you cannot even find much of Indian manual labour, as Indian labour is very expensive and Indian community has moved much ahead in the ladder, with being placed in executive positions and professions. I have watched pathans salute many times Indian men with respect. Pathans do hold Indians in respect. That respect comes from the Indian’s social hierarchy. We all do our bit in my opinion and we can coexist in this world filling gaps in each other’s hemisphere.

I have heard of gossips about pathans but I can’t obviously share them here. Crimes happen everywhere. We, especially, women have to be vigilant because whatever said, we are still vulnerable.

Once long back we dined in a fine Afghan restaurant. On seeing us the pathans did not know what to do. They had a sumptuous hot bread basket and surprisingly a couple of veggie dishes. It was my son’s idea really and this eating place looked upscale. The breads were too good from the land of tandoor. For subzi I ordered a bindi stew. The men went for a lamb dish. We weren’t given plates and we were expected to tear into the bread and dip it directly in the subzi! We made a special request for plates. The staff were amused but gave us individual plates as Hindus never will share a thali. For us its abhorrent.

Brings back memories of a group of pathans in Dubai terminal waiting for their flight. They had a 20 hour transit. They were all hunched over a mammoth paper package that was thrown open. A dozen hands reached into the biriyani at the same moment! That comradeship always would impress me. But my hubby as usual came with a retort. ‘You know why they have that custom. In olden days like mogul times if the food may be poisoned, it was to ensure that everybody died the same time!’ Trust was deficient he said because, Aurangzeb killed his own brother to ascend the throne. Whatever, I was looking at the pathans sprawled in the airport floor without a care in the world, not bothered who is looking, who is not. Snoring loudly they went to sleep fitfully! I wished life was easy and uncomplicated for me!

Posted in Political

Should only Delhi be the capital of Bharat, ji?

Posted on by veeskitchen

Delhi was Indraprastha in Mahabharat from another plane of time. Delhi has been in the thick of things for centuries, believed to have been the capital of the Pandavas. India’s destiny is closely linked to how Delhi evolved with time. So the significance of continuing to have Delhi as India’s capital is understandable. Even so, why should not there be an alternative to Delhi. Today I was watching the you tube video of building plans for a new Indian parliament in Delhi. I was struck by a thought. Our capital city was also the seat of the Delhi sultanate. Aurangzeb ruled from Delhi. The British Raj functioned from Delhi where the viceroy’s residence was turned into Rashtrapathi Bhavan, the presidential palace, on India’s independence. India retained much of the colonial architecture from the British days and Delhi profusely was Mugal in make-up. I am yet to visit my capital city frankly! But from what I see in media I feel no soul connection to India’s capital. That kind of India is something most of us Indians cannot identify with. Lost is the Mahabharath umbilical cord to Delhi. Delhi is now more and more identified with its residual mogul imperialism. So average Hindu, especially a south Indian, can hardly connect to Delhi. We cannot reckon with our invaders from Middle east, Turkey, Persia and Afghanistan. Taj Mahal has got nothing to do with us. The south largely remained insulated to mogul invasions. Indian history still has the point of view of those who invaded and occupied India over native Indians. We seem to celebrate our invaders and we have forgotten our own golden ages of Chandra Gupta Maurya, Ashoka, Vijayanagara empire, Maratha empire and Shivaji, the Chera, Chola, Pandiya, Pallavas of the south. We have forsaken our ancient Bharat when our Maharajahs ruled just from the Delhi throne. Our history text books underplay local heroes and glorify the invaders. Good to have a multicultural society but not at expense of losing our own perspective. India’s Hindu heritage must be preserved. India’s soul is Hindu not anglicized or arabized. Delhi is hardly representative of the real Bharat. Why should not India have Her capital moved to, say, Orissa for instance. My vote is for this not-so-developed state of India which lies to our south east. The new capital city must not be raised over destroyed forests. Orissa and southern states were hardly touched by the Moguls in direct conflict even if some princely states down south could have become their vassals before falling in step with the British, the Travancore and the Mysore states being the glaring examples. Arcot in Tamil Nadu and Hyderabad in Andhra were administered by mugal vassals who reigned the region without winning a war. So south mostly retained the essence of Bharat without much of distortion. It is vital to build a capital for Bharat from where neither the British nor the Islamic invaders of India governed us. While we accept our pained history as it is, it is also important to break away from the slave mentality or the colonial mindset. We have to disconnect with our troubled past for which moving the seat of power to somewhere outside Delhi can be crucial. India is not merely the mugal empire or the british raj. India is an enigma and the Indian subcontinent is flanked by seas on three sides. We are a varied landscape and diverse population. We need to centralize things. The capital must be reachable, identifiable to all and by all Indian citizens. Even Andhra Pradesh or Telengana is a good choice to build our new capital. Tamil Nadu and Kerala may not be advisable because of easy access by sea. Orissa is a larger state and the capital can be situated far away from the coastline. Madhya Pradesh and Bihar have vast extent of reserve forest areas. We wouldn’t want India’s new capital to be built across our elephant corridors. Moving our capital to geographical center of our nation could give us better sense of inclusiveness in my opinion. Security issues need to be studied in detail. Just wondering!

Posted in world cup FIFA 2022 doha

(MCC x LORDS)² = World Cup FIFA 2022 Doha Qatar

Posted on by veeskitchen

My FIFA World Cup 2022, Doha Diary.

Lusail iconic stadium (there for a bollywood musical)
lusail iconic stadium where the final is to be held. largest in the world?
ahmed bin ali stadium
japan vs costa rica on nov 27 at ahmed bin ali stadium
ahmed bin ali stadium
inside the ahmed bin ali stadium near mall of qatar
we drove all the way to al khor to catch the match at al bayt
the al bayt stadium designed like a bedouin tent
always a supporter of the underdog. with senegal flag in match vs england
the al bayt stadium at al khor.
i was one of happy 65,985 humans!
al wakra stadium
neat layout at al janaub stadium. closest to goal post for japan vs croatia that croatia won.
the friendly japanese guy gave me a plastic bag for trash collection!

Every cricket fan’s dream is to watch world cup T20 at Lords in London, England or MCC in Melbourne, Australia. Even if we are members of the cricket club in Chepauk and having attended a world cup match eons back in the MAC stadium Chennai, I don’t really get to see matches live any more when played. Plus there is genuinely not that killing interest. That kind of fan interest even for IPL matches has faded for me. Would want to go to the Lords or MCC but chances are remote I know. So imagine setting my foot into world class football stadiums here in Qatar for FIFA matches. I haven’t attended the Tennis grand slams in Doha. I did not attend the Arab league football. I haven’t watched the F1. I have to admit I never had the drive. However, having the World cup FIFA foot ball 2022 here is a different story. I used to feign interest in football because my son is a diehard Arsenal fan. So sometimes I would force myself to watch the world cup matches. I did catch up with world cup last time as well. Cricket I watch only if India is playing. Tuned into world cup T20 final this month that England won. But watching world cup football live in the ground is another level.

One among the 41000 strong crowd this November 27th, watching the Japan vs Costa rica match at Ahmed Bin Ali stadium near Mall of Qatar. Reached the venue far early anticipating heavy crowds. But things were so beautifully streamlined that I never felt uncomfortable. Airy breezy setting. Pleasant chill. The Japanese fans were drawing something like a Rangoli in front of the stadium and for my part I signed it saying it ‘with love from India.’ I told the Japanese guy who handed me the red marker that India loves Japan! Small happiness! His face lit up like a thousand watts bulb! Both sides’ flags were distributed and I got Japan. I am not really a football person at all so I was wondering whether I would get the game. But there it was, clear before me and I could enjoy every minute of the sport. Japan played an excellent game and dominated the field in both the first and the second half of the game but failed to convert some 10-20 opportunities to goals. Costa rica played bit of defensive game yet managed to carry the ball to the goal post that was closest to me. The moment watching the goal kicked keeps replaying in my mind now. That was godsend! And how the crowds erupted springing to their feet with loud chants! Electrifying atmosphere! Very neat and nice and easiest goal. It reminded me of how life is really. The hardworking talented Japan lost the match but in spirit, by merit to me they were the winners. Its more about how the game is played. How good you are in the sport. How professional and thoroughly well versed you are. The goal execution did not materialize but that does not mean the side is loser. Costa rica played a not so offensive game but lady luck was on their side. Japan is a very industrious side, that was straight away apparent. I don’t mean to underwrite Costa rica but even the amateur me may have seen better sides. Its okay. All in the game as they say. When India is not playing any sport, we can truly enjoy a game as I discovered watching Pakistan take on England in the final of the recently concluded world cup T20 cricket at MCC. England was a consistent team throughout the championship. I would have hated it had India reached the final because, every single match in the runup was won by India by one run or slender margin when the game could have gone either way. Nobody becomes world champ by fluke. You have to have the spark in you and your record must speak for you. A championship must be well deserved and honestly earnt. I do hope Japan will do better in next round. Disappointment was writ large on the faces of Japanese fans. It was exhilarating experience taking the metro rail to the stadium with a mix of international fans who had done body painting, who wrapped their bodies with their national flags and who were tattooed and with some of them carrying drums, trumpets and guitars slid across their shoulders. There has not been a train ride without someone breaking out into foot tapping music. Americans especially. Nobody is as boisterous and loud as them. Humanity is one. This is what world cup underscores. Everybody is happy. There is so much of goodness in this world that we must focus on, leaving the dirt behind. Humanity wins. It doesn’t matter to us who wins. Both the winner and the loser are family. That’s the spirit of world cup.

Dec 4th was the match between England and Senegal. As expected it was a fine match. Once again got lucky to catch two goals struck straight in front of my eyes in the goal post right in front of us by England. The third one in the second half was scored on the opposite side but still could catch glimpse of it. The goals scored right before our eyes remain unforgettable. The footwork, the tackles and the passing of the England team are proofs to why theirs is one of the finest football teams. I have to give credit to Senegal who were doing a good job to start with. Excellent defence but their enthusiasm fizzled out when England hit the second goal. The England goalie needs a special mention. Worth the money. We prefered to drive out to the Al Bayt stadium in Al Khor which was constructed by my hubby’s company in collaboration with an Italian contractor. Although he was in another project then, this is still their best where the inauguration was held. It has a 7 star pavilion for VVIPs, the kind of luxury you may not even find in yachts. Al Bayt has excellent landscaping and a string of restaurants strewn about plus it is designed like a bedouin tent. The walkways and everything around is bedouin themed after the wandering nomads of the Arabian deserts. The roof is bedouin textile fabric waterproofed. We reached the venue hours earlier to get a slot in the carpark that can accommodate tens of thousands of automobiles. Otherwise, we must take metro to Lusail and from there hop into shuttle service to the stadium (which is available every ten minutes). It was a long drive into the desert and the stadium is a feather in the cap of heavy civil industrial engineering company that is my hubby’s. More than the world cup foot ball matches, I am also going there to have a good look at the stadiums. Not to forget milling with the international crowds.

Dec 5th was our third playoff Japan vs Croatia at Al Wakra stadium. Drove over as Wakra is close. The patriotism of the Japanese never ceases to amaze me. Got my face painted with Japanese flag but bagged a Croatia flag throwing onlookers off guard! The Japanese guys were upbeat distributing plastic bags for trash collection. One group never took to their seat and were sloganeering ‘Nippo Nippo’ beating drums the entire time and I really felt bad when the team tied up and lost on Penalty kicks in the indecisive match. But Croatia like any European team played a powerful game and the Japan that I saw dominate against Costa Rica was very tame against the Europeans. Both goals were on the goal post opposite still could not miss them. But the penalty kicks were on my side and i was simply over the moon watching them from closest quarters. Truly brought out the flair of the goalies (goal keepers). The excitement in the football stadium could outweigh even the match interest for spectators! That is how infectious is the cheer and buoyant mood. Feel good factor for the crowds.

In my personal observation, I find that the tallest Europeans make the best passes and cover greater territory in defence. The shorter Asian Japanese naturally could manage only shorter passes. I loved it when Croatia scored a goal with headbutting and tied with Japan 1-1. Physical fitness is extremely important. I loved the opening ceremonies when the national flags of respective teams were carried in and displayed as their national anthems played. Whichever, the spectators were on foot giving the playing countries the respect they deserved. It is at moments like this one when you realize, it does n’t matter where you come from. I felt no difference between Senegal, Croatia, England, Japan and Costa rica. They were all the same to me and I showed equal respect to all. The crowds did.

With this our play off matches run out, and we haven’t so far been successful in getting tickets for quarter or semi finals or finals. We keep trying. For me this is lifetime experience. More than dream come true. Sometimes when our dreams don’t come true, it means something better or perhaps the best is in the offing! So what if MCC and Lords couldn’t materialize, the FIFA fruit fell right into my lap without asking! And I couldn’t have wished for more. This one month is like carnival here in Qatar even if things are low key. And i am soaking greedily every single minute in this paradise because soon this phase will be over. Still, the gift the residents of Qatar are bestowed with is like so precious that each and everyone of us shall cherish this blessing for the rest of our life.

Posted in world cup FIFA 2022 doha

sheikh in shorts!

Posted on by veeskitchen

Fan zones are the only areas where liquor flows free in Qatar for the world cup FIFA 2022. To me it all resembles the temple festivals of India. I am so used to these lightings and music still in Qatar this is the first time I am reveling in the carnival air. Doha is not exactly pedestrian friendly as everyone drives. Only the beaches and malls can find anyone on foot. So it was a rare sight seeing mixed nationalities walking down the Corniche and downtown Lussail. Back in the metro a European was giving me a strange look. I finally figured out that he was curious about my bindi, the dot. I wasn’t exactly dressed for the fan zone. We originally wanted to go elsewhere. Otherwise I would have avoided dressing up typically Indian/Hindu. Not that anyone noticed. Everyone was soaking up the FIFA mood. I struck up a conversation with an American from California. The Americans are the loudest and most boisterous with painted faces and carrying guitars etc., everywhere with them. Light music everywhere pulling a circle on onlookers. Noticed many national flags and no more sure what goes with who. Quite a few Europeans were wearing the Arab headgear over shorts! There were even a couple of Japanese girls wearing the arabi men head gear that is the red and white checkered cloth with a circular black band to hold it in place. The festivities will have a profound effect on local nationals I am sure as they set to discover the joy of celebrations with all the fanfare like we do in other parts of the world, especially my India! Qatar is as such cosmopolitan. I wear daring clothes more freely here than in India where even a 15 year old boy to 75 year old man will not resist sizing you up if you expose even a square inch of your skin. Qatar is far liberal than it is projected world wide. Anyway, we are enjoying this beautiful season which is starting to be pleasantly cold. I must make sure to pull on a pair of boots and a full sleeve shirt but I guess the shrugs can wait as of now. It will be December end when I will have to take out my sweaters even at home as minimum night temperature can hit 3 c or 4 c. So many unfavourable reports get planted in the media as I see. Qatar is benevolent and is doing a great job as I can see. So muted, laid back and not at all flashy. I really love this low key and grounded celebratory style. A statement of sheer elegance. Understatement always is powerful. How sweetly these guys have pulled the impossible feat but how modest yet. Still a long way to go, but my adoration for Qatar will be infinite after I see the way they go about this world cup. I am proud to be resident of this small but great nation that is home away from home for hundreds of thousands of expatriates from all corners of the globe.

I have to mention a word about how compartmentalized the city of Doha is. There is absolutely no inconvenience to common man. The civilian life is left undisturbed. The residents can go on with their work leading normal lives. Totally hassle free. Two stadiums are closer to my residence. One is 974 which is the container one that can be dismantled at a later date. Qatar wants to donate this stadium for assembling in an African country. The second one is at Al Tumama. Otherwise the rest are in the outskirts. Yet the maximum distance between any two stadiums is not over 30 km reportedly. Which means, Qatar has the highest density of football stadiums for the world cup. Generally, the nations that host the world cup FIFA have the venues fixed at different cities all around their country. Fans would have to spend heavily on transport and travel between cities. Doha having it all at one place eliminated the tiring and expensive exercise for the football fans. Football fans are notoriously unruly and they need management. Tickets for the FIFA matches are entirely sold out and the crowds are descending down the Doha airport in droves. Excellent streamlining and travel and hotel arrangements see to that the crowds are handled efficiently. The spread of the metro rail network ensures that the areas remain decongested and linear without the crowds spilling into the other segments of the city, leaving Doha peacefully to the residents. Having a cluster of foot ball stadiums for world cup matches in a span of one month within 30 km radius is no mean feat. It means all the resources of this tiny nation get stretched to maximum. Qatar has earlier hosted Asiad in the year 2006. Doha is now poised to hosting many more international sports championships from near future. Qatar has Qatar open tennis, F1 racing among other prestigious world events already in the calendar.

Actions matter over words. Its easiest to create an impression with words. But living up to our words is what matters. Qatar wastes no words with world media. The winning lies in achieving in real life.

Posted in world cup FIFA 2022 doha

FIFA WORLDCUP 2022 DOHA

Posted on by veeskitchen

World cup FIFA 2022, Doha. Qatar. A small picture gallery of some ‘sumaar’ photos!

I don’t have a great cam. I shot these pix only with my Android phone. My other one Note 8 also is not upto mark. So whatever I could manage to click I have. Sharing some FIFA memories. Videos cannot be loaded here so I leave them out. Shall try to update.

lussail stadium boat shaped
lussail stadium
doha metro
cleaning crew going about their job in the lussail boulevard tower
a picture is worth a thousand words!
Posted in Food For Soul

Inside the mind of a narcissist.

Posted on by veeskitchen

When the narcissist is calling himself ‘Ghajni’ you have to have alarm bells ringing. Who is Ghajni exactly. He was someone who invaded India, ransacked our ancient temple, razed it to the ground and pilfered our riches. So when someone calls himself Ghajni it means he has been studying you for a while, contemplating moves, educating himself on your connections, weaknesses, lifestyle, family, finance etc., with hacking tech so that he can finally swoop down on you knowing that his prey is within his grasp. The same narcissist may have attempted calling himself Sabyasachchi to some strong woman indicating that he was in the habit of identifying his victims and paying them detailed and special attention bombarding them with complements. One hint at the designer opened her eyes to the fact that he had a queue of conquests that put her on alert mode. So it is imperative to listen to the vocabulary of the narcissist.

If the narcissist is a celebrity, you can trust the matter to be even a family affair. Over 90% you can be sure that at least half of what you share is no news to the spouse. The missus is aware of what is afoot. The families are aware how this kind of thing works. In the art field, family cooperation to secure sponsors is basic. When the narcissist pulls the brake on your relationship, it means that the family has stamped down on the control saying enough is enough. It means, enough has been done for you to secure you steadfast that you won’t slip away and it is time to concentrate on next target. This bit of information I gleaned from a friend who is an avid follower of the narcissist’s art. Except for some very private or personal exchanges in the relationship, the narcissist could be already sharing your info with his wife and may be with you with her permission. This is pretty common in the life of stars that the public miss. Filmy lifestyle exactly works in this fashion as we are aware of. So right away this is for your understanding: your relationship is not privy or sacred. Every word passes on to the wife and sometimes even the social media handles especially whatsapp/signal messages may be texted by the better half of the artist. The wives allow some space to the performing artist because they would like to believe that this diversion is essential for their creativity. A very fine act of manipulation put to you to win your sponsorship. If you notice, normally the narcissists may have beautiful, gifted and blessed family life unlike yours and they may have no reason to stray. Relationships are a lie because there is no intent in the first place. They are securely and emotionally invested in their own families. This is ‘sampradhaaya’ for them. That is the exact name this practice goes by. Sponsors form the backbone for artists and the family involvement is key to achieving their financial goals.

So how to disengage from the narcissist systematically:

First of all admit to yourself that you have be misjudged issues and read people wrong. Coming out of denial is one major step when it comes to healing. Its okay for your closest circle who have been aware of the developments to be appraised that you have been shamed. You accept and move on. That admittance to self is key to resolve conflicts at mind level. We all make mistakes and no mistake is not retractable. All you have to is question the motive of the narcissist. Any financial interest already betrays the reason for the relationship that straigth away suggests manipulation.

Secondly engage yourself productively and remove yourself from petty cheap thrills and focus on actual happiness. Write more and get into social activities. For instance, even a visit to an orphanage can make you change your perspectives. Prioritize yourself. Make your happiness top on the list and the narcissist should figure nowhere in the list.

Thirdly it may come as a surprise to you that the narcissists do not even leave the reluctant ones free. Once marked, they will pursue their targets to the end of this earth. When in a relationship you suffer, there may be those who suffer without getting entangled. The constant stalking by the narcissist can also at times send you to depression. This is the way the narcissist would like to ensure that the marked person is not getting attached somewhere else. This can throw spotlight on the way a typical nar mind works.

Fourth, you will still be pursued long after leaving the relationship but keep going. Learn to take it in your stride but pay no attention. Don’t be fooled that you are exclusive or someone special. As of this moment, the narcissist may be doing this to multiple women. Whoever takes the bait falls prey.

Fifth, if you truly have an emotional need it is not wrong to go for a safe, steady, consistent, decent and lowkey soul mate but to have someone like that you must be prepared to bide your time. At least now you learn that there is no such thing called ‘love at first sight.’ Plant a seed and watch it grow slowly taking its own time. Do not work at it. When it is ripe, you will know in your heart without a declaration. Nobody in love professes love. Your situation must create the love and YOU MUST NOT BE FOUND. This is what is true love.

One dead giveaway about a narcissist is that, he would never dump you or upset you for no reason. The true love of our life will never emotionally abuse us. Someone capable of hurting us women that way can never hold love or warmth ever.

Sixth, do not feed the narcissist’s ego. Do not sponsor. Do not have common links. Do not respond/react. This shall solve 50%. the problem right away. If the victim card is played by the narcissist, IGNORE. Save your sanity and do not succumb to emotional blackmail. Lovebombing is crude and easiest way to down a weak person. Decent men never resort to this low level. If you are following a celebrity narc, switch over another artist of similar calibre to maintain your art interest. That way you sustain and nurture your art interest and stand to lose nothing.

Finally become your old former self, heal and live a happy life in front of the narcissist not giving him the satisfaction of making you sad. If you find new love, flaunt it. Even if you don’t, be happy and wear your happiness in your sleeve for the whole world to see. Regain all that you lost because of the narcissist: your self esteem, your friends, your enthusiasm, your cheer, your spirit, your ENERGY, your peace, your happiness. Make an attempt to stay real positive and put it in your daily practice.

There are women who are undergoing stress silently because of nonstop pursuit by narcissists. They are fighting a bold, brave battle for no fault of theirs. But may we become stronger with each passing day. I read somewhere that, it is not that we women lack the strength, it is just that we lack the will. NARCISSIM IS TOXICITY. Have no two thoughts on that.

But whatever it takes, do it today because our family deserves our best version. Our former natural normal self must return. We must not stay a damaged piece, carelessly hacked to bleed to death by a sadist manipulator. We owe it to ourselves and to our family our original buoyant self.

YOUR HEALING IS IN YOUR HANDS. But if you are a willing victim, be ready to sacrifice your entire energy reserves for the sake of the narcissist and lose your mind slowly. You will never be happy again in your life and that is it.

Posted in Food For Soul

Energy Vampires.

Posted on by veeskitchen

Energy vampires are narcissists who feast on your energies and decamp with all that you have to offer, leaving you high and dry. The sooner you identify the patterns and get rid of them, the better for you. Otherwise you will be footing a heavy price that can leave you shattered and take months to heal. Our energies must be reserved for our families first and our dearest friends. Love and affection don’t normally start from day three with you first brush of online sex and blossom into full relationship in three months. Anyone lovebombing you is stealing your energy. Narcissists typically identify and zero in on high energy women. Your enthusiasm is something they can draw, benefit and grow from. However narcs also get bored easily once the initial chemistry wears off. Their interests will be always short lived. You will tire them soon and they will already be looking for other preys to continually feed and fire their own ego. They will have justification for every misdeed of theirs. The self serving creative or artistic men may say that this is what keeps them going. But what about the destruction they leave in their wake. Why should gullible women be bearing their brunt when they go on and enrich their own self centered lives. You can see that the pattern will repeat itself every now and then so that the narcs hold on to you by the threads never allowing you to leave. You are a source of great energy for them and if you can supply them with free online sex and finance, it is all the more better, a blessing for them. The narcissists are not fools to let go of the goose that lays a golden egg everyday at their whim and command. If you are vulnerable and weak, you play right into the hands of the narcissists. It is upto the women to break the cycle and liberate themselves from these brandishing chains. The narcissists can leave you devastated, breaking you and making you believe that you are loved. They can emotionally abuse you. They lie, play double games and never have remorse for dumping you like soiled toilet tissue when they have no temporary use for you. They know that you are theirs whenever they may want to claim you back because they hold you by hook. In their eyes you are still trash not worthy of respect and you are too psychologically dependent. To anyone reading this I suggest, be bold and strong enough to say a big NO and walk off these killing traps. Just think of all that you have lost over months: your positive vibes, your energy, your happiness, your self confidence, your self respect, your friends, your feel good and upbeat mood. Nothing is worth our natural carefree and happy state of existence – that we took for granted before the narcissist turned our world upside down. Some damaged women can not easily return to their precious previous self. It will take them months or years to heal completely. Even so you will know that, something about you has permanently changed. You become less trusting. You become a little less happy and you brood a lot. YOU ARE NO MORE SOMEONE YOU USED TO BE THANKS TO THE NARCISSIST. Some women even get into depression. If you already booze, you are done in. This is why boundaries are important. Narcissists target women with no boundaries because it is easiest for them to steal energy from unlocked hearts.

SAY NO TO NARCISSISTS. THEY ARE TOXIC. THEY ARE ENERGY VAMPIRES. THEY DRAIN YOU AND ALTER YOUR PERSONALITY FOREVER THAT YOU CAN NO LONGER RETURN TO YOUR PREVIOUS HAPPY GO LUCKY SELF. REMEMBER YOU NEVER FELL IN LOVE WITH THE NARCISSIST BUT THE ILLUSION OF WHAT YOU WANTED THE NARCISSIST TO BE.

In today’s online world, you need to be a lot more wiser. I thank my stars for the guiding light I got keeping me away from trouble. I haven’t lost my sanity and neither am I for sharing my precious energies with unworthy kind. MY ENERGIES ARE FOR MY FAMILY AND FOR CONSISTENT, LOYAL, HONEST , DECENT AND WORTHY FRIENDS I HAVE EARNED OVER YEARS not days/weeks/months. Having said that, I still believe in Soul Mates but beware, it takes eons to form that kind of deep meaningful bonds. If you find one that grows on you quiet without having to dance and sing around trees filmy style, then you are lucky. We are all entitled to that kind of meaningful company, I don’t deny. It can do us a lot of good and improve the state of our mental health. And may be sometimes such a soul mate already exists in your life but you haven’t figured it out yet. Don’t trust the FLASHY avalanches that can excite you but carry you to deep depression. Women in late 40s and early 50s also have to factor in the menopause mood swings. This could be a reason for women to fall easy prey to narcissists. Truth is a bitter pill to swallow.

Posted in Drops Of Life

Gold Standard.

Posted on by veeskitchen

My simple dad worked for the central government undertaking that imported gold and silver bars via Madras harbour. He was in charge of the delivery and accounting of precious metals. While it was understood that most before him misused their position, my father had the cleanest hands. Never touched a single coin or bar that was government property. In fact his colleagues would lament how he was blocking others from enjoying life. Remember this was not the computer era. Statements were typed out and erasex was used for typos. Gold bars were easy to be substituted with copper or other metal bars. Committing a fraud was easy and would have gone undetected. And over it all if you refused to ‘cooperate’ there were vested interests who even threatened of implicating the honest staff in false cases or eliminating them from the scene once for all. Only my father’s soft nature saved him from life threatening situations. Even the worst masterminds paused looking at this gentleman who led a puritanical life not wanting to harm him. My father who never remarried after my mother, my father who owned not more than two or three sets of clothes at a time, my father who lived as a vegetarian, a teetotaler, my father who never raised his voice or argued or picked up a spat with anyone all his life – he was one of those from last gen who we would never get to see again. Was he a fool, I wonder because, all around now I see such a corruption everywhere. Did he not figure out how to live happy. How to live a luxurious life. How to have good time. What stopped him in his 40s from marrying again. What stopped him from smoking or boozing or even going to a picture. Why did he always go only to the temple and the market. Why he never left home once after evening 6 or 7. Why did he never take a day off for a vacation. Why did he not own a car or phone that he could have afforded. Why did he sleep on a mat on the floor when he could have had on a comfortable bed. Why did he even not eat in good restaurants. My father who took the same bus route 3A from Mylapore for years to go to work at the same place indeed did not know how to live life. Which is why his life was brutally cut short who knows. I wish I knew my father better, I had spoken more to him, I had given him the confidence and I had told him that I WAS THERE for him always. Sometimes we don’t have parents telling us how to live. They show us by their example as my parents did. My parents had a very short life on this planet. It is in their absence that they raised us mostly. I owe being what I am to my poor parents who were so straight and clean and simple and honest and godfearing. My belief system is like that of my parents. My values are like that of my parents. It is enough I know if I am half good as them. That’s what matters to me really. Long after they are gone, they are remembered for the good people they were. I am someone who benefited from the m m t c scholarships during my school days. My school fees ranged from as little as thirty three rupees in my class 6 to one hundred and fifty rupees in standard 12 in the year 1986. My father’s office gave a cheque in my name for six hundred rupees every year until 1984 which was my high school year when I gave my standard 10 exams. For my higher secondary I received nine hundred rupees. Education was subsidized and/or scholarships given to children of working staff by my father’s profit making organization. Those cheques went into bank account in my name. This was valuable money in those days. My sister too received hers. This central govt undertaking was a good place to work. Hours after my mother passed away, they sent a cheque for her last rites. Health cover. Good yearly bonuses, great canteen (been there many times), airy workplace and generally a healthy place to work in. I have blogged a lot on my mom but I do owe a lot to my father too. He took a housing loan from his office to build our home that is on lease today. How many lives can employers touch. Finally with my father, i still don’t have a closure and it hurts. I was n’t even aware that such a word called ‘depression’ existed in my teens. I hope I can be forgiven for my ignorance. Otherwise my father would have lingered for a lot more years who knows.

Posted in world cup FIFA 2022 doha

Live Love Doha.

Posted on by veeskitchen

Blogging from Doha where right this moment a football match is on for the World Cup FIFA 2022. And what a quiet as I sit here when November brings in the first chills of the season. The West Bay with its tall skyscrapers in the Corniche is closed for traffic but is accessible via metro rail. This end of the city is where the real action is, even if the stadiums are spread across Qatar. Qatar is but a tiny nation, larger than Doha only by sizes. You can summarize, the whole of the country as Doha Plus. The only airport is the Doha International. Airports (the old one is opened up temporarily to handle the crowd) reportedly did see the crowds. Crowds in millions are arriving as of this minute and the hotels are full. The neighbouring countries like the UAE are chipping in with accommodation, with some forty plus flights operating between Dubai-Abu Dhabi and Doha every single day to bring in the football fans who may fly back to other GCC nations after the match. It is one hour flight. Cruise ships and the desert tents make up for exotic stays for the fans who are descending here from all across the globe. As a resident of Qatar for fifteen years now I know we have some of the finest infrastructure here. While the European nations normally would pledge some $5 billion in the world championships, Qatar has pumped in over $200 billion and has left no stone unturned to make the FIFA world cup the grandest success.

I am from India and as an expat living in Qatar I have enjoyed the benefits this government disburses to all the residents even if we are not citizens. I received the booster dose for Covid in the government clinic in Doha when the year started and I am eligible for complete free medical treatment as resident of Qatar. I would not have had the golden chance of viewing the original Picassos exhibited for avid art enthusiasts for an exorbitant price by the government who also let me savour MF Hussain in some of the finest galleries without having to shell out a penny. The latter’s works contained those of the Hindu gods that would have been a big ‘no no’ in India. I have access to finest library and museums and restaurants and malls here and the standard of living in Qatar is par excellence. World media paints the entire Arabian gulf in very bad light which is deplorable. If it is that bad, some hundred nationalities would not be working and living in the GCC nations including in Qatar, from America, Australia and Europe among other world nations.

We observe unruly mobs in football matches normally but the way the sport is enjoyed here in Doha is really beautiful. Even in the countdown to the world cup, I noticed no holdup anywhere, no hassles, no fusses, no glitzy glamorous show-offs. Life went on as usual. I did spot some foreign nationals in the malls and in supermarkets who were grocery shopping. Then there were those walking besides me in the park in the evenings. I always revel in the quiet of Doha; it has grown on me and I soak in its laidback tranquility. It gives me the elusive peace that I cannot even find in my mother country India. Now is no different. It doesn’t look like a global sporting event is afoot just right across the city. We are having our regular day. The 974 stadium is close to my residence. A couple of hours before yesterday’s match, traffic was partially diverted but the plans were very well laid. Qatar is new to this crowd handling unlike mammoth nations like India, the States or even Italy or Saudi. The Catholic and Islamic religious centers draw hundreds of thousands of pilgrims that the host nations are adept at handling with practice and ample geographic territory. Picture Qatar doing it with local residents (most of who are expats like us) who have taken up the volunteer roles to serve as security personnel, ticketing staff, grounds person, media staff, etc. FIFA world cup 2022 is very well organized event with a lot of thoughtfulness gone into making it a hassle-free and a memorable gala. Remarkable! The fans zones do cater to beer and other beverages and snacks and memorabilia from FIFA. The metrorail has very good connectivity with frequency to transport thousands of fans from one end of the city to the other. The sightseeing tours and packages are best tailored for short visits ideal for small countries like Qatar. My bet is on Desert safari (which is unlike Dubai and a lot more different on a varied terrain) and on Desert camp life. The beaches are pristine and are shallow, suitable for water sports and camping overnight. Some do offer tents for stay. The water scooters and camel safaris and buggy drives on the sand dunes are recommended. I am a museum and art gallery person so I do know Qatar has an impressive collection to cater to our aesthetics if we are that kind of indoors person. The souq is also unmissable with its old world charm. I have loved Doha always for its quaint unflashy lifestyle and those who moved here from the noisy Dubai first were put off by the quiet. Doha takes time to grow on you but when it does, you will never go back to Dubai. My friends who moved here from Dubai can vouch for that. The food is Arabic, Mediterranean, Continental, Indian among others. I am not a seasoned traveler but I have toured a handful of countries. Qatar I can rate as one of the safest havens where law and order is meticulous and shopping is very pocket friendly and great experience. You can never shop the way you can for brands in Europe or America the way you can in Doha.

I was here during the Gulf crisis that saw the tiny peninsular nation isolated as they took on bravely a couple of hostile GCC nations that closed in on them menacingly. Now peace reigns but how in twenty four hours the government made alternative arrangements to see that the residents did not want for anything was amazing. Within a week four thousand Jersey cattle were flown in from down under and thus was born the local dairy farms. Until five years back, even milk and milk produce reached here from across the one land connection from the neighbouring country. No price hikes, no passing on the extra burden to the residents. I have nothing but utmost respect for Qatar for the way they handled the political crisis that had the potential to flare into a serious global crisis. World media in fact was fanning the fire exactly for that. It must have taken all their wit for Qatar not to be provoked when the stoking went vigorous. Their patience and tolerance finally won through. Not a single loose talk to ignite passions. Such a humility is rare to come across. We can take a leaf out of this great nation. The kind of maturity you find in the statesmen here is worth emulating. It was Trump’s time in America. And it always hit me then how the tiny speck of Arab country had such a responsible and grounded leadership when the largest democracy in the world had a loose cannon for the president who shot his mouth out of turn whenever opportunity presented. Diplomacy of this finesse is the real Raj tantra if you ask me.

Qatar since has become a lot more self-sufficient using the crisis as a life lesson. Their airways have more direct flights now to destinations around the world than ever before. Local manufacturing got a boost and Qatar is determined to stay as much independent as possible in all fronts. Organic farming has also caught on in a big way. Doha has received a magnificent face lift and city living has never been this clutter-free and convenient. Every facet of life in the city got upgrade thanks to FIFA world cup. Quality of life for expats in Doha is one of the best in the world.

Qatar has gas reserves for next two centuries apart from oil. Oil wells can dry up and the world can shift to green energies but the LPG will continue to stay in demand. Yet Qatar is prudent and i have never seen wealth splashed carelessly which is pretty impressive. So low key. Not even the Eid is loud and raucous. The islamic festival is only marked by silence with the one sound of the azaan piercing the quiet sky to call for prayers. It always fascinates me how muted even the celebrations are here that normally may bring the roof down in my own country India where we do not know how to enjoy an occasion without playing it up to the hilt with maximum decibels, pomp and riot. In Qatar I see that we can have a good life without having to announce it from roof tops.

Expats love working, living in Qatar not without a reason. We are a family who have prospered with Qatar. I have nothing but absolute gratitude for Qatar. I keep this my second home away from home always in my prayers. Long live Qatar! Congratulations for wonderful master handling of FIFA World Cup 2022! Wishing you many more laurels in future dear Qatar! God bless!