Posted in Food For Soul

going vegan… from vegan silk to vegan leather…

Posted on by veeskitchen

Many of us raised vegetarian from birth still have no qualms about leather or silk in our everyday life. We try to rationalize our guilt trip justifying, our belt or purse is ethical leather. We can’t be without dairy either which is far more horrific than even leather industry or meat processing where the cattle/sheep die a single death.

Is it time to move away from our phony vegetarian values and adopt a sustainable, humanitarian lifestyle.

Try as I may, I am unable to grow out of my obsession with silk living so close to Kanjivaram (Kanchipuram) geographically. Traditionally too, ours is a silk weaving community, mostly hailing from Kanchi and Arni, although our folks have almost completely weaned themselves out of our native occupation in recent times. I do still have a few relatives left out who have installed ‘thari’ or handlooms in their ‘thazhvarams’ and ‘mithams’ (front yard, courtyard, backyard etc., in traditional tiled ‘ottu’ veedu or house typical of Tamil Nadu that are fast disappearing even from our villages – that are big and airy and impressive) and keep weaving as family: daughter-in-law to mother-in-law to son and daughter – as they did their chores like cooking, cleaning etc., side by side. One lady told me they wove this way one or two handspun Kanchi silks watching our tv soaps in the evenings as dinner was served! The men tended to the marketing/business part.

In fact, our family tree grew along this silk road to success! Arni is my father-in-law’s hometown. Even now there stands his ancestral home with 4 grand entrances in 4 streets, with a family temple close to one gate (where outsiders were not allowed up until very recently), a second one dedicated to business deeds with big enormous ‘thinnais’ that served like modern day showrooms in the bygone era…, one entrance reserved for women alone and one for servants. Erected in late 1800s, the colossal palatial edifice stands today as a testimony to the family heirloom and wealth that was spun out of Kanchi/Arni silk business by our forefathers. Silk is therefore much more than a simple attire to us. Silk meant food and livelihood for centuries.

Senguntha Mudaliars built their fortunes with silk industry which was patronized by the royals, the British and the temples all at the same time. Very conservative and pious community, they diversified soon to become successful doctors and engineers by the turn of the century. Now very few families stick to the traditional profession. Astonishingly, the business has been taken over by Naidus and Reddys of Chennai! Sengunthas started owning huge estates with money made from silk business and donated heavily to upkeep of Hindu temples around world war times. I know because my grandfather gave away dozens of houses within Chennai city limits to various temples as my family signed on the dotted line without asking a single question. My in laws families too gave up. We are blessed not to have an iota of regret for what we have given up. All the silk money is gone and with it we lost our native occupation as well to new ventures that are doing extremely well. Times change. Life changes. A 2000 year old familial knowledge and heritage and customary practice is now not in our hands.

Markandeya is believed to be the sage who gifted the art of weaving to Sengunthas as we believe, hence mostly Markandeya gotra. Pazhaiyana azhidhalum, pudhiyana pugalum. Absolutely no regrets about the modern day transformation.

My mom who taught until the last day of her life deaf and dumb middle school girls, had a severe aversion for silk. All her life, she wore silk only on 2 occasions: on her wedding day and for our house grihapravesham. A true vegetarian.

However, I have never been able to resist the temptation of silk, any silk for that matter. Give me anything be it Benaras or Tussar or Mysore or Maheshwari or Assamese or Chanderi or Patola or Bandhni or Uppada or Gadwal or Jamdani or Kota or Kashmiri … hahaha I will take it without a second thought!!! Of course, my reigning queen in Kanchi Silk !!! Not only because we have an emotional familial bond with Kanchi silk that bred my ancestors, but also because, from experience of traveling and shopping (even if not much) a little bit I can tell you, Kanchi is No.1 silk in the world that women and designers and fashionistas outside India are dying to lay their hands on! Undisputable No.1. To think that my forefathers perfected this Kanchi silk weaving art and robed the Gods and Goddesses and Kings and Queens, makes me proud kind of.

So Vegan silk always raises for me these uncomfortable questions. Profound shaivites who thronged temples, Sengunthas still wove silk out of the silkworms drowning cocoons in boiling steaming water. Every single traditional vegetarian family in south still draped this sinful silk most importantly on auspicious occasions like family weddings and pujas and other celebrations, and to temples. Why this self-contradiction.

I have heard of Ahimsa silk which I believe is only partially less evil. In regular silk, the silk worms in cocoons are boiled in a cauldron. For Ahimsa silk, the silk worm is let out and the cocoon is separated for silk yarn. Tragedy is, prematurely ejected from the cocoon, the silkworms die a torturous death after a few hours of miserable life on earth, before being brushed enmasse onto garbage. In what way is Ahimsa silk better than regular silk.

Talking to someone who shunned silks and leather entirely in last few years, I was disturbed to learn how the tearful vibes of the millions of silkworms that sacrifice their lives in most crushing cruelest manner get spun into the silk robe you drape. Same holds true for leather. Every leather accessory we may use still may moan quietly with the tragic vibes of the animal (cow or sheep or goat or buffalo) whose life was violently snuffed out by skinner-butcher. At least a fraction of such a bad vibe can get transformed into our soul and influence our own aura. This can have a lasting effect on our spirituality and even perception of things, life. There is therefore a compulsive need to grow out of silk and leather. It asks for greater mental strength to rise about these materialistic temptations, but I guess I could be ready.

Vegan silk I believe is a great alternative because it is mostly made from plant cellulose. In specific cases, microfibers may be woven into the vegan fabric/textile upon request or as situation/design demanded. For the first time ever, I am going for Vegan silk that is completely animal abuse-free. I can have a clear conscience donning the silk. I am trying to stop silk shopping completely now and switch over 100% to vegan silks. Because vegan or whatever, my fascination for silk continues! At the same time at the back of my mind I recall that this Kanchi silk is what fed my ancestors for generations and generations. I am here because of Kanchi silk to say NO to Kanchi silk! What an irony. But this is something that has to be done without sentiment or prejudice. Sooner or later….

Vegan leather too similarly is mostly made from plant cellulose that is bio-degradable. Great alternative to leather. Leather industry with its toxic chemical dyes for effluents also is a great pollutant of our rivers and other water sources. All the more a good reason to say a big NO to leather, ethical or whatever. By the way, what is ethical leather. The hides and skins used by ethical leather units reportedly are procured from meat industry through regular channels. Does that make leather ethical by any means?

I also have always owned leather purses, handbags, belts etc up until now. Somewhere we must make a beginning. Stopping forthwith, leather shopping.

What is very testy is, giving up dairy. I gave up coffee for 10 months but it was torturous. Then I decided that no Mother Goddess wanted me to give up coffee!!! So saying ‘excuse me, i am starting coffee Ma 😀 ‘ to Her one fine morning, I restarted my coffee routine! Similarly living without milk or panneer or curd or buttermilk seems next to impossible! As a vegetarian I find dairy to be my greatest comfort food! Can’t just do with Almond milk or Soya milk – which I have tried in futility in Doha.

As for eggs and meat, many are switching over to organic eggs and organic poultry as well. The poultry industry breeds caged broiler chicken that are pumped with antibiotics and growth hormones. Something our younger generation must keep away from, because this can be very damaging. And to think about what the poultry birds have to go through! Meat consumption has gone up in India only in recent years. Earlier when I was a kid, meat was a luxury reserved to very rich few. Others saw meat once or twice an year only. Biriyani is the greatest health hazard to our youngsters. Unhealthy with spicy content that can cause heartburn and bathed in oil, this foreign food needs regulation. I am that rare vegetarian who can turn out the best mutton and chicken biriyani from my kitchen (as certified by guests) without ever knowing how it tastes, but I only use organic meat. Seafood is better than river fish as river fish swallows a lot of toxins.

Size of fish in Doha and size of fish in India raise another important question. My husband favours Shankara (red snapper) fish which is of 6 inch plate size end to end by length in Middle East, caught from the Arabian Gulf seas. In India the same fish is much, much smaller in size almost only half in size, which indicates we are overfishing. Very soon our oceans could be running dry of fish. Scary.

So back to basics, finally…

I will post updates on this one, as to how well I am doing with my Vegan silk and Vegan leather. As for my existing silk and leather, I am keeping them because I have invested heavily in them over years. But no more fresh buy where it concerns silk and leather. I would like to spread the message.

Let us think of a Vegan silk India and Vegan leather India. My only request to vegan businesses is that, please don’t go easy on polyurethane or other such micro fibers in vegan leather or silk, in which case original silk and leather will look like top-of-the-line always. We are all for eco-friendly and sustainable lifestyle but we will not give up silk and leather for microfibers and plastics instead. Make sure, the vegan leather and silk are one hundred percent plant based. Reforest/afforest the deforested ranges that your industry derives raw material from. This is a very important angle we have to look into.

Always after silk, cotton is my immediate next choice. Sustainable, bio-degradable and suiting Indian climatic conditions, and 100% desi, Indian cotton is one more No.1 in the world. Absolute class when it comes to the yarns and weaves we have from different states of India. In foreign residence, climate may require me to go for manmade fibres but given a choice, my vote is always for pure silk/cotton. However from now on, it will be Vegan silk and Vegan leather. Let’s see.

Posted in food as therapy...

Mixed Millet Idli & Dosa

Posted on by veeskitchen

Mixed Millet Idli & Dosa

Ingredients for batter :

Varagu (Kodo Millet) (Kodra) – 1 cup

Kudiraivali (Barnyard Millet) (Jhangora) – 1 cup

Saamai (Little Millet) (Kutki) – 1 cup

Quinoa (Seemai Thinai) – 1/4 cup

Thinai (Foxtail Millet) (Kangni) – 1/2 cup

Kambu (Pearl Millet) (Bajra) -1/2 cup

Cholam (Sorghum) (Jowar) – 1/4 cup

Urad Dal – 1 and 1/4 cups to be soaked with 1 tsp Fenugreek (Methi) (Vendhayam) seeds.

Salt to taste (Pink Himalayan Rock/Crystal salt used)

Water for grinding

All millets used in this recipe are organic. Only Urad dal is not certified organic. All these listed millets are also native to India except for Quinoa. Before rice and wheat consumption became fashionable this century, our forefathers mostly ate millet three times a day. Even now, villagers in India have millets for main course. Ragi Mudde is popular in Karnataka and Tamil Nadu peasants have Kezhvaragu koozh for breakfast.

I left out Ragi/Kezhvaragu (Finger Millet) (Mandua in Hindi) because, mostly in roti flour I mix Ragi flour 1 tsp and flax seed powder 1/2 tsp. Moreover, Ragi will make Idli appear very darker. Consistency also may not be upto mark on grinding the batter. May be a handful can be added.

Mixed Millet Idli & Dosa

How to grind the batter?

Mix all millets together and rinse clean. Leave standing water for soaking overnight. (Eight hour soaking recommended)

Soak urad dal and methi seeds together.

Grind to buttery consistency the urad dal first.

Grind to coarse consistence, the mixed millets. Little millets may remain unground, but it is fine.

Pour the mixed millet batter on top of ground urad dal and stir well. You can salt at this stage.

Keep aside. No need to add baking or cooking soda or yeast.

Batter will ferment and raise well on its own just like regular Idli/dosa batter in a couple of hours (or more).

Refrigerate and make Idli/Dosa like regular Idli/Dosa.

Millets are rich in vitamins and minerals. Totally gluten-free and are slow to digest. Therefore ideal for the diabetic or pre-diabetic. However, Millets may be consumed with caution in case of thyroid malfunction. Perfect weight-loss diet.

Power breakfast to kickstart your day with! Sumptuous, nutritious, filling, lighter at the same time. Soft, fluffy, melting in mouth. Best served with Mint-Coriander (Pudina-Dhaniya) Coconut Chutney and Lentil Sambhar and Urad Dal Vada.

Posted in food as therapy...

Murungai Keerai Pirattal (Moringa Leaf Curry)

Posted on by veeskitchen

This is very basic, still I thought this must have a spot in my blog.

Murungai or Moringa is poor man’s vegetable in south India. Moringa is our native tree. Lower middle class homes have the tree almost always in their backyard or frontyard. Hence there is an abundance of murungakai (Moringa veg) and murungai keerai (moringa leaf) supply anyday in local markets.

In my case, my street has many homes with Mururgai tree so i get both Murungai keerai and Murungai kai free most of the times.

Moringa is also considered auspicious vegetable! No wedding feast without Murungaikai sambar.

Murungai health properties are well documented. Besides being a terrific immunity booster, the murungai family is rich in essential nutrition that keeps cancer away. Cheap and best, Murungai is naturally an integral part of south Indian cooking. Kirumi nashini (germ killer).

My interest in Moringa grew manifold when I started noticing Moringa based beauty products in Bodyshop in Doha. Ever since, of course, I started including Moringa more into my food routine. (As we Indians continue to sleep, many of our traditional medicinal recipes are being patented for profit in the west).

Although many of us have Murungai sambhar and Murungai poriyal pretty often, not everyone has an appetite for Murungai Keerai. However, it is mainstay of my kitchen always.

For Murungai Keerai Pirattal, I took a big bunch of Murungai branch leaves that my housemaid plucked for free (!) from a neighbour’s tree!!!

Here are the ingredients:

Murungai Keerai bunch

Onion medium -1

Garlic – a few pods

Dry Red chili – 2 or 3

Coconut scraped – 1 or 2 tbsp (optional)

Peppercorn – 1/2 tsp

Salt to taste (used Himalayan Pink Rock/Crystal salt)

Water a little (optional)

Oil for tempering: I use either Gingely oil or Coconut oil both coldpressed 2 tsp

For tempering: 1 tsp mustard seeds, 1 tsp broken or whole urad dal

Method:

Pluck the Murungai or Moringa leaves carefully from the stems. Rinse in running water and keep aside.

Grate onion fine

Crush the garlic. I use a stone pound (what we call ‘ammi’ in Tamil)

Break the dry red chili and de-seed.

Crush the pepper corn. You can do this while crushing the garlic.

Heat the oil in a kadai (I use either cast iron kadai or clay kadai only)

When the oil is about to smoke, temper with mustard seeds and urad dal and dry red chili.

When the seeds splutter, add the onion and saute to golden brown.

Add next the crushed garlic-pepper corn.

Finally add the rinsed moringa leaves.

Add little water but mostly not needed.

Cover and cook to a crispy tender. Won’t take more than a few minutes. Under 10 min precisely.

When the murunga keerai has no more water retention, add the grated coconut.

Salt to taste.

Stir well and switch off fire.

Result: the Murugai Kai Keerai Pirattal (pic) which can be had as a subji or be mixed with rice for main course. Serve with a tsp on ghee with rice.

A must for teenage children. Moringa is a staple vegetable in our families always. But of late, our traditional vegetables and greens are hardly appreciated by the younger generation. Today we see many women in twenties with ovarian cysts etc. Infertility is on rise. Moringa is one tree that is truly organic because, it grows right in your backyard. It is pesticide and chemical fertilizer free. One good reason to make Murugai keerai and Murungai Kai poriyal/sambar a compulsory part of your weekly diet. Moringa or the Murungai family is credited with natural fertility properties and other medicinal values as per Ayurveda. It is not without a reason that our families have traditionally made Murungai a vital part of our everyday menu.

So is Murungai Keerai yummy? Not sure about that! Mostly it is acquired taste for us hahaha! But today’s Murungai Keerai Poriyal was too good which is the reason I am posting it here in my blog.

PS: Btw I just loved the subtle fragrance of Moringa moisturizer in Bodyshop !!! Was like none other! So original! I can’t believe the MNCs took the Moringa out of India to make cosmetics from face creams to perfumes!

Posted in food as therapy..., Food Porn

what’s cookin’ : straight from my tawa and kadai

Posted on by veeskitchen

I stopped posting recipes long back because, (1) am not a foodie (2) not a gourmet cook (3) just a regular everyday housewife left with no option than cooking (4) mine is literally hole-in-the-wall 9×6 tiniest minutest kitchen (5) don’t find cooking captivating though cathartic at times like writing this blog (6) prefer eating out during weekends (7) jelebis and halwas and laddoos and murukkus are best at Grand Sweets and Shree Mithai hahaha !!! so why give them competition !!!

Even so, decided to add one or two authentic recipes here that i have perfected on improvisations over traditional methods …. No new found passion for cooking. There are many many more with such a crushing devotion and interest in cooking. Mine is average/normal fare as i said sans any frill – just the mundane run-of-the-mill stuff minus the paraphernalia such as window dressings like presentation while serving, topping etc., etc., displaying your cutlery and table/dining ware that you hardly use otherwise (only guests are lucky in our homes to sample our precious dinnerware!!!)

Food for me must be sumptuous, nutritious and delicious at the same time. I don’t believe in dieting. Eat heartily until you burp. Then work out. That’s my fitness mantra.

Will try to pull up a few old ones too from a previous blog.

Posted in Mylapore Musings

Anandhi

Posted on by veeskitchen

In the times of Kamala Harris for VP and feminism, I would like to share a real life story from Mylapore from the late 80s-early 90s.

It is about Anandhi, our housemaid. She was from a village in rural Tamil Nadu. I can’t believe that I never even once asked her about her nativity in all those years she was with us.

Actually I don’t think she would have been older than me by more than 10 years. She was married off as an 18 year old when she was still working their farms, to a rickshaw puller in Santhome area. He was an alcoholic who also physically abused her, not earning a single decent rupee. Anandhi’s mother-in-law supported her and the humble lower middle-class home of theirs was her in-laws. Owing to poverty, Anandhi walked to our house, a few streets away for helping us with our domestic chores. She was picky about who she worked for. In our case, she was taken in by the fact that two teenage motherless girls cooked, packed lunch, studied on their own as their saintly father never spoke a word to them. ‘Paavam pa nee’ she used to tell me often then.

Anandhi was very thin herself that I almost felt guilty taking her help for our laborious menial work at home. However, she never took a day off except for one month in summers to go back to her hometown for a vacation. She also slightly limped.

Anandhi told me that her husband had undergone vasectomy for government money of 500 rupees during Sanjay Gandhi period. He married her without disclosing the truth to her. So Anandhi was childless. Often she was sick as well. She also worked for my aunt family. My uncle opened a bank account for her. Anandhi hid the information of working for me to her husband and saved her salary every month in the bank.

Life went on. Life was all consuming. Life was trying. Life was tough.

Finally it was time for me to get married and move over to my in laws’ place. After my marriage I came to know that there was no news on Anandhi’s whereabouts. She had simply vanished from the scene without a trace. It was a time before the cell phones became commonplace. We knew where Anandhi lived but somehow missed finding out about her.

One day when I was visiting Mylapore with my 2 year old son, there was a knock on the door. My aunt opened the door to greet Anandhi carrying an infant boy. We were all shocked and surprised and confused at the same time.

Anandhi had disappeared around the time of my marriage. Next 2 to 3 years there was no information on her. We even feared the worst about her. That probably her drunk husband had killed her in rage in one of their regular nightly spats even if Anandhi was very, very softspoken. So imagine our delight on seeing her! But the baby?

Anandhi then stunned us relating to us what happened to her since 1993.

Around the time of my marriage, she found that she had advanced TB. Unwilling to upset her rural and aged and poor folks, not wanting to disturb us or her family, she quietly got herself admitted in government Tambaram Sanatorium TB hospital as an inpatient without a single penny in her hand, where she resided convalescing and recouping for more than an year. A shy villager who could not read or write, she still was one very intelligent woman. She knew how fatal TB could prove to be if left unchecked. She got herself fully cured with patience and forbearance and used this time to learn about the reversal procedures for vasectomy for her husband and plan for their future.

One fine day, after complete recovery, she returned to her husband’s home unannounced. Mother and son were taken in by surpise. She used the euphoric moment to persuade her husband to go in for vasectomy reversal. The surgery was a success and Anandhi, cured of TB, conceived immediately. Her mother-in-law transferred the title deed of their humble dwelling unit to Anandhi’s name, not her son’s. Soon she passed away. And there was our Anandhi, waiting for her son to turn one year or so, healthy enough to visit us.

We really cried rivers of joy on hearing our Anandhi’s story with a happy ending. My uncle brought out her passbooks for bank accounts. She refused to take them with her. We gifted her generously and as her son was one year younger to mine, I passed on to her a whole range of toys and clothes and other nice things. Anandhi said, she was now unfit to work so she had machines to do her domestic chores at home. She rented out a portion of her small house that gave her a regular though meagre income. Her husband was still not yet totally reformed. He lapsed back to his old ways now and then. Without her mother-in-law’s moral support, she was feeling tired and alone but the little boy brought her so much cheer.

At three years, Anandhi admitted her son to a christian convent in Santhome. I left for Malaysia. My uncle handed over her savings entirely at that point even if she refused to take charge. That was the last I saw of her.

Today her son would be 25 years old. Whether Anandhi is still alive, i do not know. I do think of her sometimes. May be I should find out. Too much happening in life ever since that we hardly have time for everyone sadly.

Anandhi who took her husband for reversal of vasectomy and got herself admitted alone in TB hospital severing links with one and all for more than an year completely, always makes her the boldest heroine to me somehow. A total illiterate who knew nothing but sowing seeds, weeding, washing clothes and dirty dishes, who wouldn’t utter a word but give you only that silent smile, was so brave and strong-willed in real life where and when it really mattered. Her quiet courage, confidence and conviction amazed me because, she never even boarded a bus on her own until she was diagnosed with TB. Her decency and concern in not revealing her health condition to everyone fishing for sympathy or seeking help or not even causing distress with the news, showed to me the refinement in her character. Her compassion for two motherless girls and their widower father even if she was only a housemaid, would be touching. She barely spoke a word or two. But in those two words she always managed to convey to me her total love and affection. In that age and time, that was so very heartwarming to me no doubt. That silent company. That shy presence. But that heart that always cared.

How to go invisible and remain unobtrusive if situation demanded. This knowledge and knack many of us have not mastered or are unwilling to learn. Coming from peasant background, Anandhi knew the etiquette without having to be told about that. Setril mulaitha senthamarai really.

I hope Anandhi is well and happy wherever she is, if at all she is. Her frail health always remained a concern.

Today we hardly have such genuine affectionate people around us. People who make real sense. People who are of substance. I used to share my morning coffee with Anandhi for years in our house ‘mitham’ (mutram) where she would be washing our dishes as early as 6 am. I do miss that kindness even if it came only from someone who worked for us for a paltry sum.

Posted in Mylapore Musings

The Chimney Glow

Posted on by veeskitchen

Watching period serial ‘Stories by Rabindranath Tagore’ (that by itself is worthy of a post), I was reminded of the Chimney light days from my childhood in Mylapore. May be we had this light at home as a spare until I turned 10 or 12. We had no zero watt night bulb then.

I have this memory of filling kerosene in two such small chimney lights for two rooms in my house. That evening duty was mine. Kerosene was in a tall narrow necked glass bottle tightly screwed shut, stored away in a shelf. The wick would be pruned by my mother and both the lights would be readied by 6 pm for lighting. No bedrooms for couples in those days. We slept in rows in the living!!! Sleeping on the handspun straw mat was the comforting bedding ever for me! I have no memory of my parents sleeping alone or together as a couple sorry!!! What a sacrificing life our parents and grandparents led for our sake!

By 7.30 to 8 pm, we would already be ready to retire to bed, because tv was barely there. And also because I had a working mom. We got our first tv in 1977 when i was in class 4 only. Before going to bed, I would light the chimneys sometimes or my mother did. The glass lamps served as our night bulbs hanging from a hooked nail in a corner off the wall that was safe from breeze from the partly open windows and fan and anything combustible.

I still remember the mini chimney lights but i can’t find exact replica images in the net. I will keep looking for them. I used to go to sleep focusing on the small glow from the open top of the glass chimney. The bottom part that held the fuel was metal with a screw and wick. I also think that the chimney glass part with (sometimes jagged) circular opening on top to let out smoke often broke. There are faint memories of pushcarts in the streets selling those glass chimney tops. Or may be we had these in the platform shops in Luz or Mylapore tank. Did we have different colours like burnt orange, brown, bottle green? Although all I can recall from the one at home is plain colourless glass chimney.

Carrying the lit chimney lamp around the home in eerie darkness with shadows lengthening or shortening was another reason to delight! Mostly this was whenever the power was out which was pretty often in late 70s.

If I ever slept with my granny, I would be listening with her to Ceylon Radio Tamil broadcast in the soft light of the oil lamp. Mostly I did this in summer hols. Late evening 9 pm was considered like midnight in those days!!! Watching the chimney shadow flicker on the wall opposite was another childhood pastime as I would doze off into bottomless dreamless sleep that only kids are capable of.

When did we grow out of this chimney light habit? I guess until my mother’s time we had it at home. Later the yellow zero watt night bulb substituted the glass and metal chimney light that used to leave a very light black smoky shadow on the wall.

Slowwwww days and slower peaceful nights. The chimney light era reminds me of such a comfortable age when nothing was done in a hurry. Makes me nostalgic. What a charming old world that was! The dancing flame of the chimney lights on windy thundery monsoony nights surprisingly still stays fresh in my memory…. as the long nights during some power-cut days when we cooked, ate and laughed and lived in the mellow shadow of the chimney glow…

Posted in Political

Raaman Aandaalum Raavanan Aandaalum….

Posted on by veeskitchen
a picture is worth a thousand words. Indian CEOs in US: single proof of altruistic relations between the US & India irrespective of successive governments and heads of the state in both the countries…

This piece was originally written hours before Joe Biden decisively won the US elections. Hopefully he proves to be good for India. His personal life tragedies, I trust, could make him by far the most compassionate US president in a long time who knows. Those of us who have walked a bed of thorns think differently. I look forward to better India US relations because America is family for me now! I will love America as much as I love India… started loving America like India the day my son set foot in America. Let the world recover smoothly from coronavirus and let us wait for the dawn of happy times yet again. Indians have vested interests in America. The States is like a second home to most Indian families who have a son/daughter/sibling living there. Indian community has enriched America in myriad ways. We have given America astronauts to top surgeons to software professionals to nursing staff and even hoteliers. Sundar Pichchai and Satya Nadella are not born everyday. To the US with love, INDIA.

However I don’t share such generous views on VP Kamala Harris even if she shares Tambram genes equally as Jamaican. She never identified herself as half Indian all these days. Why sudden Indian/Tamil affinity now. Villagers in Mayavaram are crazy holding prayers for her victory. Anything for the daughter of the soil.

*******************************************************

What a debate the Trump Biden neck-to-neck contest has triggered in our midst.

India is very much concerned because our economy is directly tied to the US. Latest flashpoint has been the H1B visa renewal revised to every year from every three years badly affecting the IT sector and the fresh graduate Indians in the US. Mostly therefore we look at US elections from micro levels because Indian professionals rule the roost in America in key sectors such as IT, Medicine etc. We are more concerned about our kids going for masters to the US, H1B quota for the IT industry and US$ exchange rate over who is good for maintaining the balance of power in the world. Biden may be a better choice but how many of our liberals and leftists pause to think what a damage the Democrats have done to us Indians over decades. Republicans have fared far better (excluding perhaps Nixon). At macro level, for the Indian nation, Republican presidents have always been somewhat favourable politically.

For the leftists I have these questions: So immigrants are fine in Europe, America and India ( with Rohingyas). But why not in Middle East. Name a single islamic country/Arab nation that has taken in Palestinians or Syrians. How dare you. Come to the gulf. You can see thousands of Palestinians without a passport. What an intellectual dishonesty you guys have! You dare to question Trump, Modi, Macron everyone but you have not an iota of conscience because you never raise the flag as far as the islamic nations are concerned. You talk of islamophobia when you know none else in the world issues a ‘fatwa’ calling for death to fellow humans. Nowhere else in the world are pre-teen non-muslim girls abducted, raped and force converted to Islam as it is happening in Pakistan. Yes, every single non-muslim working/living in middle east cannot even proclaim his/her religion in public or criticize ‘the faithful’ lest he/she may rot in jail for rest of his/her life or worse, be stoned to death. And you talk of human rights in secular nations like India and the US. I am challenging you: try eating a pizza or even a pack of peanut in public in Pakistan during Ramzan in broad daylight , leave alone in Arab countries. I will talk to you if you are not already mutton kheema.

Black lives do matter but minorities cannot ever take law onto their hands whatever the pretext. Playing minority victim card is such a regular scene even in India. Just like our liberals/leftists have no word on conversion mafia/hawala fundings, they maintain a stoic silence on crimes committed by the minorities as well. How good is that Vatican keeps pumping millions of dollars into India for conversion guys? Or are you sleepwalkers with selective amnesia. Is it within human rights for foreign/desi missionaries/evangelists to venture into our tribal lands and convert indigenous natives?

Most of us who have been residents in the middle east are aware of the Trump mischief when he visited Saudi that triggered a commotion in the region and threatened world peace a couple of years ago. Trump was no way saint. Yet, that someone had the nerve to call a spade spade was admirable. Have you ever noticed a single leftist/liberal write or talk on triple talak or UCC (uniform civil code) or suppression of human rights in middle east. The leftist sense of justice: Shout out to Rohingyas but go silent on Yazidis. Raise a storm over Ram Mandir but go quiet on reclaiming church lease estate on expiry of 99 years. Even Hongkong could have gone back to China but not a single church may return to government fold. Law interprets itself differently in India. Or for secular democratic nations in general. Same law holds different again for communists and islamists. No audit for madarasa and church fundings but keep the temple administration with ruling government. If this does not smack of hyprocrisy, what does. My take on world affairs altered after i grew cynical on happenings in India.

Nationalism is not born without a reason. You feed it and then you cry foul.

Dear leftists/liberals today you can wag your tail proudly because Hindu dharma has bestowed such a freewill upon you. Democracy is very much incumbent on demography of a nation. Don’t let population jehad reduce you to minority. Then let us see whether you will even have any scope to exist. How many of you have it in you to admit to this bitter truth, a possibility within this century. Has happened in Egypt. Happening in Turkey presently. How long before it happens in India.

The same leftists who call the Dalit treatment a historical injustice, have no word for forced conversions or jiziya or razing of Hindu temples by Moghuls or the islamic anarchy that bled the Hindus for centuries. When you have no sympathy for the Hindu ancestors who suffered persecution under Arab/Moghul/Turkish/Persian marauders and sadistic invaders, you have no right to talk about the caste discriminations in the Hindu society prevalent for centuries. Both cancel out each other. Both were the prevailing dharma of those times. Even slave trade was the norm and dharma of a bygone era. Don’t hold the current generation responsible for the crimes and injustices and atrocities committed by their forefathers – because you never want to hold Indian muslims responsible for anything from past. Let the past remain in past NOT SELECTIVELY but.

If you want to be chummy chummy with muzzies, you are welcome, but don’t ever wag a finger at us Hindus. We have had enough. And now, we are finally on the offensive, having been on the defensive for too long.

In this context, I have always viewed Trump as a plus for India. His actions on immigration could have cost us a bit even if we are legal immigrants in the US (as white collar workers), but he had every right to regularize immigration in his own country. Average Americans welcomed his reforms, at least to my knowledge and thinking. If trump faulted, it was probably in the management of covid 19 pandemic.

I wouldn’t want to judge a man by his words. Rather by his actions. Trump succeeded in securing maximum benefits for the US economy pushing for lowering of trade tariffs in India, China etc. He did what was good for his country whether be it about Climate change or whatever. In spite of signing up for Climate change, what is India doing for a better environment. What are the efforts for greening the planet by the signed nations.

Trump’s scathing remarks on China are true 100%. His fears about China well founded. His warnings on terrorism were not out of place or time. Democrats such as Obama are known for emboldening terror elements. Just see who is rejoicing with Biden win. Our Paki neighbours. Trump stopped the US from financing terror nations and minced no words issuing a statement to that effect. US economy registered a robust growth in last 4 years.

I am very skeptical about Democrat for POTUS because our history is not rosy as I said. These democrats go soft on terror. Our international policies would be at loggerheads. As for the IT sector in India bringing us valuable foreign exchange, it may however be time to cheer with Biden winning the presidential race and it might be good news for our masters aspirants and research scholars and other immigrants, but we need to wait and watch how these guys are going to take our relationship further.

Mostly Joe Biden will be a mixed bag for India.

Those of you who associate Republican presidents with war scenarios forget that the following Democrat presidents never exercised the option of calling back troops but instead supplied additional troops to war fronts.

Health care reforms are fine but we also have south American economies like Venezuela ruined by socialism. Nothing is free in this world. You have to earn every single penny. Unchecked freebies will take any economy to Venezuelan-like crisis.

May be he was haughty and boorish and hated openly, yet Trump was good for India because he was a thorough businessman. You can deal with this kind. It is the dillydallying ones we have to stay wary of. The suave and sophisticated scoundrels reap all the praise because they have it in them to hoodwink the so-called elitist intelligentsia who fall for these nonsense charms head over heels. As for the general janata such as me, it takes a lot more of convincing to consider someone for what they are truly worthy of.

Too early to predict anything further. Keeping my fingers crossed.

Posted in Pictures Desi

Why Is ‘Metti Oli’ Still No.1 Soap In Tamil Television.

Posted on by veeskitchen

Lockdown saw return of the old guard as far as tv soaps are concerned. ‘Metti Oli’ made one more comeback to our homes and is concurrently doing two channels easily even after all these years. How can it be possible to retain such a rapt audience interest during repeat telecasts?

Well, for these very simple and at the same time thought-provoking reasons:

*For truly middle class values.

*No glamorous or cosmetic content

*Down to earth portrayal of characters, characterization and scene settings

*No erosion or watering down of morality or ethics of the community in general

*No graphic or violence content

*No vulgar content

*Family oriented underscoring relationships and family and old world values

*No hidden agenda underlying the script and screenplay

*Honest portrayal of circumstances without exaggeration

*No villainification of family members deliberately pitted against each other

*No hero worship of a singular character

*Every character is fallible and no character is too perfect

*No spite or vengeance or intense hatred or malice beyond acceptable standards

*No sister-in-law planning to poison the new bride

*No brother-in-law rooting for his sister-in-law

*No daughter-in-law hatching plot to oust her mother-in-law

*No mother-in-law pining to strangulate her daughter-in-law

*No maligning of characters or character assassination

*No kids talking too much for their age

*No customary prison scene

*No alcohol consuming or smoking character

*No extra marital affairs

*No clandestine affairs

*No home breakers

*No brother-in-law scheming to usurp family business

*No plotting of murders in temple precincts

*No sense of hopelessness

*New hope even in dire situations

*No overt negativity

*Relatable to our very own lives and environment

*Nothing flashy or fancy

*More forgiving, more generous

*Dignity and earnestness in character portrayal

*Immense patience and tolerance and goodwill in/of characters

*Over-all feel-good factor

*Wholesome family entertainment that you can watch with family

*You watch this serial for the story content not for the glamour of characters or their clothes.

*No single hero/villain. Equal importance to all role players.

*Joint families crux of the story. Joint families are fast disappearing in India replaced by nuclear families.

*Life humbles characters. Life overwhelms characters who swallow pride and shame frame to frame to keep the family in-tact. Which is what matters over anything and everything. Family stays united at any cost.

I hope there is a lot to learn from this very decent and grounded and low-cost/budget production. You don’t need to invent conspiracies to cheat and kill and dupe and shortchange to have a roaring audience. I don’t watch soaps at all but years back, Metti Oli on its very first run was compulsive enough for me to let down my guard and watch some episodes from midway. Recently I caught my mother-in-law still hanging on to the old do over others. I leaned over from my dining to take a peek at what was playing in the tv screen and found that Metti Oli is still charming and appealing to my heart. This is the secret to success. It is easy to warm hearts without damaging anyone or pouring poison into someone. Let each one of us remind ourselves of this. We can take a leaf or two out of Metti Oli even for our very personal life.

Posted in Extras

Men And This Green Eyed Monster!

Posted on by veeskitchen

I wrote this piece originally on June 16, 2014. Reproducing without much edits. Lots could have changed since then. All said, male jealousy is cute! Luving it!

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Men and this Green-eyed Monster Ugh!

June 16, 2014

On a lighter vein, I want to blog about the typical Indian husband who feels utterly jealous about every man who enters his wife’s sphere of imagination in some way or other.  The object of our fancy could be anything ranging from movie stars to sports person. Good looking guys who seem fit in middle-age with no pot-bellies or receding hairline are No.1 sworn enemies. Our men just can’t stand the most successful crop of their generation even if it could be the very Barrack Obama!  Male envy is horrible tangential truth!

My husband calls me in day time everyday if we are in 2 different parts of the world.  I was seriously watching ‘Chennai Express’ in tv the day before I left for Doha, enjoying the song ‘Kashmir tu, main Kanyakumari!’  Annoyed that I was disturbed midway through, I asked him to call back after 2 hours when the picture would be over because I was savouring every single minute of SRK in dhoti in Tamil turf – a veritable feast to my eyes.

Irritated my hubby shot back, ‘you will never reform. so why don’t you elope with SRK!’ and I replied ‘wish I could!  if only Gauri permits!’  21 years now into marriage and here we are back at square one .

 TOM & JERRY! (Never mind I have grown out of the SRK phase by now, hubby is still stuck in the 90s).

Arvind Swamy, the ever-green anti-hero: Reminds me when in the year 2002 or so, we stopped at an ATM to withdraw.  Hubby was at the wheel and i went into the kiosk alone.  In the next machine stood the macho Arvind Swamy, the local hero, and hero of films like ‘Roja’ and ‘Bombay’ – also dubbed into Hindi.  It was sure nothing to Mr. Swamy but it was all butterflies in the stomach for me.  I stammered for speech, had nothing to get his autograph in, in fact i did not even smile.  But the actor gave me a big smile and waved ‘hi’ – and i responded belatedly nodding my head.  We stood for a minute staring at each other, myself still not coming to senses having seen my dream hero of early 1990s in such a close -up.  He was starting to age, in his early 30s just like me, (same age as me or perhaps a year or 2 older I think).  He had gained weight slightly, looked more mature, his cheeks were flushed and he looked even more handsome in person than in celluloid screen.

In 2002 I guess all of us were a lot younger, and me still naive somewhat!  There was still this school-girlish side of mine that emerged out every now and then!  And more over I never ever met with a celebrity in real life – and Arvind Swamy is actually the one and only star or Page 3 guy I have seen anywhere from close quarters (up until now this is true).  Naturally I remember the ATM thing to this day – whereas for Swamy – i think he will be shocked into coma if he comes to know that a 40+ woman who is his fan since her college days is still besotted with him LOL this way!

Getting back to the car all through the drive I kept rambling about the handsome movie star with whom I shared under 1 minute private space in an ATM kiosk.  Hubby and son got irritated.  Hubby said a guy who sang songs and danced around the trees with women could never be man enough.  I ridiculed that and argued Swamy was an industrialist in the city, doing extremely well, and acting was his passion. I was awed totally that day and called my friends and relatives to share the exciting news with them!  All the while my hubby kept reminding me, my hero would have forgotten my plain jane face the moment he stepped out of the ATM, I was one drop in a billion who never mattered to him, how his list of girl friends could be a very long and impressive one, and all that blah blah- while here I was fawning all about Arvind as if I was a teenager.  My H did ask me before we married which actor I liked most and I remember telling him ‘Arvind Swamy’ who was at the peak of his acting career then. Ever since Swamy became like his arch rival.

Not that I am celebrity-crazy either.  I guess this was a one-off incident for me, because one of my fondest memories is that of going to ‘Roja’ (original Tamil version) in the cinemas with my school girls – right on Jan 18, 1993, a few months before my marriage.  It was like a girl-equivalent of bachelor’s party – on a friend’s wedding day.  I did not even know that my hubby existed then just a few km away from my home – who I met in March and married by June (arranged match).  We girls – some 20 of us, brought down the roof of the cinemas every time Arvind came on the screen with our whistles and hoots hahaha! That was also ARR’s first muscial score in Tamil cinema – the picture was dubbed into Hindi as well by director Mani Rathnam.  So Arvind was like our dream hero.

During our brief engagement period, my would be-hubby wanted to take me to pictures.  ‘Which one?’ he asked and I opted for a Tamil remake of ‘Arth’ in which again the hero was Arvind Swamy. ‘But it is a divorce theme!’ You seriously like this fellow Arvind Swamy?!’ asked my fiance’ in an incredulous tone.  Until now he keeps rambling to my son how stupid and arrogant I was that I took him to a divorce-subject picture, our very first one together, only because I was smitten with this Swamy guy!

Sometime back hubby mailed me a picture of my one-time heart throb – the same Arvind Swamy in his latest avatar:  bald, obese and looking visibly tired and aged. ‘Your handsome hero looks like slob’ was the comment. ‘You know he is also divorced?! single and lonely, want to try?’

So I am resigned to this fate now: never will my H forgive or forget Arvind and I have to live with that the rest of my life.

Son does not lag behind his father in this matter.  I made the mistake of telling my son how I was crazy crazy about George Michael when I was in class 11 & 12 (1984-86). For his share, son supplied the news from internet how George Michael is totally a failure case presently, arrested for possession of drugs and is a complete junk.  He made sure I saw the picture of my teenage poster boy in present times – and shared the info with his father online.  Father & son cheered how one by one, all the men I adored in life were fast falling from the high pedestals where I held them.”She likes this kinda men’ was hubby’s comment  (in fact this has become something like his rhetoric in last few years).

Hubby can’t stand SRK either because I also made another terrible mistake of telling him when we were newly married that I was crazy about Shahrukh Khan right from my school days when the hindi serial ‘Fauji’ was first telecast.  After we married, the serial ‘Circus’ was on tv and there was SRK again – and I showed him to my husband ‘see this is the guy who i was always searching for!  he was missing in action for years, but he is back now in tv screen, soon he will be a big hero, something tells me!’

Just like I predicted, SRK went on to become No.1 star in bollywood in the following years.  My hubby never forgives him for that hahaha! ‘Still he is a is a bisexual!’ he maintains, telling me how actors paint their faces and wear lipstick and rouge!!! Anything to put me off and wean me away from SRK!

So hubby had to really reel under double-pronged attack of SRK and Arvind Swamy from 1993-96.  In this period the picture ‘Bombay’ was released both in Hindi & Tamil, another of Mani Rathnam’s social movies.  ‘Tu hi re’ is my No.1 favourite song until now although I always love the original Tamil version the best.  Until this day, this one has the effect of stopping me in my tracks:

To make matters worst, AR Rahman scored the music for the picture. Finished. The 3 guys are No.1, 2 and 3 adversaries of my man respectively- for the only reason I love them. All of them are born between 1964-1968, same age as us both (me & H).

Our fight gets too much with A R Rahman, the music composer who is also a local guy.  Rahman’s meteoric rise to fame is well known.  An ardent Ilaya Raja fan, my hubby still maintains he hates Rahman – only because i insist i simply love him! Secretly I am sure, he admires Rahman’s music although would never admit it to me. Other chief reason to hate Rahman: that he attended PSBB! (Son calls him PSBB snob and swears ARR is over-rated – boys from SBOA etc specially have this thing going against PSBB alumni).

Next is my love for cricket players – I used to adore Ravi Shastri in my school days. ‘Not all Ravis are good’ insists hubby adding how Ravi Shastri was a playboy in his heydays.  “Imran Khan and Wasim Akram?”  ‘Imran is too old for you and Akram is type-1 diabetic.  Any woman who cohabits with him and bears his kids will be giving birth to type-1 diabetic kids remember that.  The kids will have to live with insulin injections life long and even the man injects himself day and night’  comes the instant reply – as if I am rooting to marry Akram someday.

My other heroes like Viv Richards, Maradona could be AIDs carriers, who knows! “You don’t know about West Indies, South American guys!’ quips my H. Maradona’s fall from grace is world popular. Really got to give my man an award for villainising my heroes like none else can!

We were talking of Barrack Obama once and I said, ‘see the US president is just a few years older than you!’ and the reply was ‘Obama won with black votes; wait he is already unpopular, won’t get through to second term!’  But Obama did go on to win the second round much to my man’s dismay!

I wonder really what is wrong with Indian men, rather Indian husbands!

I only have to say I like this particular sports person or film star – my hubby gives me enough reasons to believe the hero i adore is mere crap!

I suppose it is okay for our husbands to like filmy heroines and other popular woman personalities.  We wives have to be generous and broadminded when it comes to them drooling over Maria Sharapova or Bipasha Basu’s anatomy. ‘Don’t be that lousy jealous wife!’ we get admonished.

My friend says when she was watching Rafael Nadal in tv, her husband told her that Nadal was unattainable hahaha!

Don’t even ask about Richard Gere and Brad Pitt, my other heroes!  Our guys are rating themselves to Hollywood range now!

Hubby even goes to the extent of claiming John Abraham waxes his chest!

Vishwanathan Anand, the 5 time World Chess Champion and a local hero is another natural anti-hero.  Went to the same Loyola college as Arvind Swamy.  ‘Pampered kids!’ is the comment. Especially the Don Bosco school – Loyola College combi guys are hated fiercest!  Both Anand and Arvind fall in the same category. Back in our college days this was a potent combination in guys.  Hubby and bros are all professionals, academic to the core having attended medical and engineering colleges, so they missed out the city fun in 80s in arts and science colleges like ours. Still they know what it used to mean for girls like us in those days. Funny, I attended college the same time as Anand and Arvind, but never remember them from any Inter-collegiate culturals (most of which that I silently attended (entering essay/dumb charades categories with some similar-minded friends) (i believe the engineering colleges used to take the culturals to an all new level where lit-fests were not the highlight but some tech themes were, like assembling a model for instance). I think V.Anand was already starting to make waves as a Chess Grandmaster. As for Arvind, I recall his ‘Nestle’ Sunrise’ coffee ad until today where he first made his appearance in public during his/our college days.

So the school-college combi is very much a flashpoint in our men’s psyche I guess.  Never mind our son is exactly one such product of modern times – the SBOA-SVCE combination which is in engineering circles today as much pedigree as the DB-Loyola pedigree of our times.  I never thought much about it until a friend’s daughter exclaimed, ‘your son is SBOA-SCVE guy?!’

So guys before you hate the ivy-league men, think of your own sons first.  You want it for your sons, but you cannot digest it when it comes to your wives’ crushes who could be ivy-league guys !!! What a typical male Indian hypocrisy.

Btw, latest about Arvind Swamy:  He is a single parent who’s been raising his kid alone, winning the custody battle. As for Anand, he is a disciplinarian to the core, never in gossip coloums, decent family man.

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We girls keep laughing and laughing at the childishness and sense of  insecurity in our men who are nearing 50s now.  (Some friends’ hubbies are already into 50s). What should we do to let them know, how much we have come to love their pot-bellies and salt-and-pepper hair and/or baldness and even the annoying snoring LOL !!! So much so that I keep shocking my MIL by throwing my legs over her in deep sleep when she sometimes sleeps next to me in our bedroom hahaha! So our men are like our well-worn comfy clothes I guess!  Shabby (!) may be hahaha but that we can’t do without either!  The huggable teddy bears!

One of my son’s friend’s mom comes home – a widow, same age as me.  She keeps telling me how much she misses her man, not only emotionally but also physically.  Our men are like our life-habits – like our toothbrush, like our mobiles, like our laptops hahaha. Seriously speaking, SMOKING KILLED 3 OF MY SON’S FRIENDS’ FATHERS IN LAST 1-2 YEARS. The age bracket 45-55 is most vulnerable. 3 of my so-called friends who I happened to regularly meet in school Open Days etc are widows suddenly. The husbands were aged 48, 50 and 52 and died of sudden massive heart attack.  On Fathers’ Day, this is what I want all fathers to think about.  Change your lifestyle, get serious please! Go for Masters check-up every 6 months – which is the best gift you can give your family.

Guys we are not married to John Abrahams or Ambanis – we are married to you, the real, normal men.  We accept you the way you are – and love the way you age – with your eye bags, long sight, police paunch everything:-)  The last thing I would want a middle-aged man to do is to get hair-weaving or a facial done in men’s parlour.  Stay the way you are.  Love the way you are.  And take care of your health. Male Menopause, now is that true?

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Back to the topic:

The latest addition to my hubby’s blacklist is Arvind Kejriwal.  “Anyone your mother favours will lose deposit.  See the Kejriwal joker!’ said hubby to my son on Kejriwal rout in recent elections.  My husband’s fierce hatred for Kejriwal is attributed to one main reason: that he went to IIT !!!  (that is my assumption but he denies it strongly!)

Arnab Goswami is another regular villain in our homes. ‘He must be a decade younger to you’ is the daily dosage of enlightenment I get.  ‘He is getting facial done’ is the next standard comment.  “All housewives love him and can’t go to sleep if they don’t see him on tv by 9’0 clock’ is the third punch line.

Last heard father to son: ‘Your mother you see, never likes the straight ones! They all are crooked! She was right only one time – with me!’‘

Yes guys, Arvind Swamy is divorced, SRK is bisexual, Wasim Akram married a firangi too soon after losing his first wife …. so ? They will still always be our sweethearts, why don’t you grow up!!

Last week when hubby came home from office, I was watching Pak tv every single day – looking at Karachi airport attack news.  I knew what would be coming forth next.

As expected father and son exchanged glances.  ‘Whole world wouldn’t bother but your mother likes them.  Wonder who is her fancy now!’ said the father. ‘She likes losers’ supplied the son helpfully. Both are now trying to figure out which guy I like in Pakistan tv hahaha. I am keeping them guessing.  No soon than father started, ‘so is she now….’ that son finished with eager relish, ‘an ISI agent?!’

Ever since I am laughing nonstop in the privacy of my bedroom 🙂

Updated Jan 28, 2022

Wondered what kept my hubby quiet all these days. As I was deeply engrossed in a Karnatic rendition playing Wordscraper (scrabble with a difference: 8 letters), rung his typical words in the periphery: ‘Mylapore’s Poori, Pongal, Thayir Vadai, Bajji and Puliodharai did a good job!’ I knew who merited this comment. ‘Ya without the help of chicken, mutton, prawn & fish you see!’ I retorted but by that time my hubby had vanished.

Posted in Food For Soul

2019 was an exceptional year for me…

Posted on by veeskitchen

2019 was unlike any other.

In this one year,

I visited 38 ancient temples in Kumbakonam-Mayavaram belt with my school friends gang after some meticulous planning. In fact for Chitra Pournami that fell on a friday in April that year, I was sitting teary eyed in front of my ishta devta Mother Lalithambika in Thirumeeyachur for over 5 hrs reciting Lalitha Sahasranama at least for 3 times and then singing in chorus many bhajans along with my friends and other devotees. The temple was very crowded. We got our Mother Her favourite silver anklets. There is no way I can put into words the range of emotions that washed over me in those 5 hours. At that moment, I was ready to take leave of everyone and everything at the lotus feet of my Mother. From Brahadeshwara temple in Tanjore to Airawateshwara in Kumbakonam and rest, we covered vast grounds in mere 5 days in very hot April starting our days by 4 am and retiring to bed by 11 pm. All of us are middle aged women – friends from school days. We all have our health woes. Then what gave us the strength and will power to go on. I wonder whether I can ever repeat this feat in future.

Before embarking on Kumbakonam Mayavaram tour, I had already paid a visit to the temples of Kanchipuram. Of course, as Kanchi is stone’s throw away it is not a surprise still periodical darshan of Kamakshi and Ekambareshwara and Varadaraja temples is like tonic to me. This was with my Zumba gang.

Earlier with my school friends I had also visited the Chengleput temples – Eri Katha Ramar temple, Bhagavathy temple at Mel Malayanoor and Selva Lalithambika temple, which is not on tourist map.

Before it was time to leave for Doha, a short stop at Madurai on way to Kodai couldn’t be missed for a million dollars. Mother Meenakshi beckoned.

Of course, not before visiting our Kula Deivam in Arni, a must for us. We don’t do anything without getting Her approval.

A friend from Hyderabad flew down to Kerala and four of us friends were scouting the Athirapalli forests going up on the mountains until Valparai where we doubled down to get back to Thrissur the day after we had a hearty darshan of none other than Shri Guruvayurappan at Guruvayur and of course the unmissable Vadakkunathan (Shiva) and Bhagawati before I exited India this time from Kochi.

Guess I flew in and out of India at least half a dozen times. There was still time to go on a short holiday to Azerbaijan with my hubby and then later on to Turkey. Both were different kind that I enjoyed maximum, unaware that Turkey could be our last vacation in a long time to come.

Before Turkey, my zumba gang booked me into Tirumala Tirupathi tour. I was still in Doha when arrangements were made. Within a couple of days on landing, it was time to leave for Balaji darshan on the last day of Purattasi. Believe me or not, it took us not more than 1.5 hours in queue for a glorious darshan of Venkateshwara, the lord of the seven hills. As I neared the sanctum, all prayers were forgotten; with eyes watering for no reason, all that my heart was filled of was Balaji. None else. You called me without my asking, why. I kept asking. Nothing else mattered. I was there.

Three awesome days at a Kotagiri tea estate cottage was simply out-of-the-world when the entire Zumba gang was there. This was back to back after Tirumala-Tirupathi.The orchestration of the entire tour was by my friends who gifted us an unforgettable fun-filled vacay with girlfriends for a lifetime. I discovered that going places with friends is on entirely a different and unimaginable plane compared to holidaying with family.

Before the end of the year, it was time for a Karnataka round trip covering the Mangalore coastal belt with my Doha wives gang. My second visit to Mookambika temple in Kollur, first to Sharadamba temple in Sringeri among others.

With Mookambika, this is my life experience. From 2001 I am doing this Kuthuvilakku Puja assuming Mother resides in jyothi swarup in the flame reciting Lalitha Sahasranama (which I am reciting since 1993). First I was using my mother’s tall brass diya Pancha muka one, now i have moved over to small and compact silver diya. I never believed I would be visiting these holy shrines at all shuttling between Qatar and India. My hubby wanted to just stay home whenever he visited. My friends and I weren’t bold enough to go on temple tours on our own. This we are doing in last 5-6 years only. But I always told Mother Goddess, even if i couldn’t visit Her, She was there in my thoughts and prayers always. Never made a conscious effort therefore for visiting Kollur but the train tickets were booked by a Doha friend of ours without even my knowledge for his wedding in Udipi. And that’s how I ended up at Mookambika unasked for.

During my first visit to Mookambika temple in 2010 i think along with my hubby, it was not very crowded. I stood with my eyes closed in front of my Mother. A priest walked to me and said, ‘hold this diya (a small size kuthuvilakku) and show the aarthi to Mother right from where you are.’ I couldn’t believe it. My hubby who stood with me understood in a moment what was happening to me, and the significance of the entire development. I lost sensation of my entire body right then and felt like floating. Felt extremely light like a feather, as the priest handed over to me a same 5 wick (pancha thiri) mini kuthuvilakku like I used in my Puja, encouraging me to do the aarthi. Mother was caressing me as I performed the aarthi in total stillness. I stood pretty close to Devi as much as it was allowed. At that moment I knew, my Mother heard me every single day, every single time. She honoured me the way unimaginable to human mind. I never once asked to visit Mookambika. She summoned me out of the blue to Her abode. I could be the smallest ant worthy of squashing, but She still got down to my level even if I could not lift myself up to Her level. I felt connected and only my husband knew and believed the same way I did. I related this to my closest friends who were stunned to hear this story.

This second time in Nov 2019, just as my foot touched on crossing over into the Mookambika temple doors in Kollur, I felt a shocking vibration course through my body. Like if you get a mild shock on touching a power point. Barely lasted for 30 seconds. I was here with my different gang of friends again. I wasn’t prepared for this welcome, but I knew at heart my Mother was waiting for my return. We had late night and morning darshans, double bonanza. Blessed to have a darshan of my Devi in Her golden chariot. Blessed to see Her in her golden lehenga. Just staying the night over very close to the temple was enough for me.

I kept asking Mother, why Ma. Kamakshi, Meenkashi, Lalithambika, Mookambika, Sharadhamba, Durga (Kateel and Patteeswaram), Abhirami, Garbarakshambika just to name a few avatars of Hers apart from Balaji darshan. Left out was Athivaradha and Arunachaleshwara temple at Thiruvannamalai (finished in fag end of 2018) and Chamundeshwari in Mysore (covered in January 2020). Why such an avalanche of blessed darshans.

So much has happened since. I flew back to India on Dec 1st, 2019. Never did I imagine that our life course was set to change forever and my return to Doha would become a big question mark. Not that I regret. I started 2020 too with a visit to my street Shiva temple for midnight zero hour darshan. Visit to Kapaleeshwara temple and Mundagakanni Amma temple very regular. Even Navashakthi Vinayaka temple in Luz. My favourite is Devastana Balaji temple run by TTD in T. Nagar.

A complete roller coaster of emotions since December end but all is well that ends well. I now understand the significance of the events of 2019. Life has since given me back to back promotions 😀

Sometimes when I pray only tears stream down my eyes. There is no way I can explain this to others. I just know that my Mother Raja Rajeshwari is hanging on to every single word of mine. All the more it is important for me now to be more responsible and cut down on the negative things. But then we are human. To err is human.

During this Navratri I only wish to record that, Mother listens to every heart. There are subtle ways She lets us know that She is listening. I got married as an orphan. Today if i am at least in this station in life, it is not without Her guidance and blessings. Before my wedding, everyday I would be before the Durga in Valleeshwara temple, Mylapore and Karpagambal in Mylapore. Mundagakanni Amma. Not to leave out our street Renuka Parameshwari. Making jaggery pongal for Mundagakanni for years, decades now. Used to make within the temple precincts but age has caught up with me now. My energy level is low so I now make it at home and take Her the offering. Also for the local Devi temples here that are Kaval deivam for this locality.

In january, I don’t know why I rushed a visit to our Kuladeivam and then to make pongal for Mundagakkanni amma and our Kaval deivams. Normally I do it in Aadi and if i am there in Thai month, if time permits I do it. Yearly once, a ritual. But this year, I finished my annual ritual well in advance in Jan. After corona, there is hardly scope for the ritual now.

She is the Mother for the motherless. Just surrender. Without questioning. More accepting Her direction in total faith. That’s what I do.

Used to attend Varahi homams once upon a time for over 2 years every Amavasya. From then on, I tell myself, ‘Vaa endru azhaithaal vaaradhiruppalo Varahi.’ I take Her everywhere with me. She is my courage. She is my strength. I pray with Her to kill my self pity even after all these years. I am on my way to become a grandma. Mother has more than compensated me over years. I acknowledge Her direct hand in my life, yet as a lowly human form, all I can think of is about myself. My world is very small. How I wish I could break this jinx and become less self centered.

Navratri to me is awakening of these powerful emotions. I have a different kind of relationship with my Mother Goddess. I have arguments, I call Her ‘vadi podi’ – I don’t know if anyone will understand this equation between us.

To my Mother I pray for the gentlest heart that can understand others and bring happiness to everyone. To recite the Lalitha Sahasranama in every birth of mine and be able to visit Thirumeeyachur and Kapali temple in Mylapore in every janam of mine. I don’t think i will break the birth cycle in another 1000 years 😀 To have the same family every birth.

I think I prayed very much for same things in my previous janam. Just an intuition. In every single Devi temple I stepped into in 2019, i managed to recite Lalitha Sahasranama. I wish I could die with Mother’s name on my lips even as I chant Her nama.

Mother exists for those who believe in Her. Sometimes all I long for is to keep my head in Her lap and go to sleep forever and never wake up, in content and peace.