Posted in food as therapy...

Cleaning up as you cook…

Google is spying on you all the time, so no wonder that this article on ‘cleaning as you cook’ landed in my feed. Until I chanced upon this thing, I was hardly aware of what I have been doing since my teens.

Yes, as a motherless girl, my cooking started right in my teens. In fact even when my mother was around, in my pre teens, I was trained to cook basic minimal south Indian food such as Idli/Dosa, rice, sambhar (with lentils) and vegetable dishes. The truth is, this is by no means simple meals! All these are detailed cooking procedures but viewed as trivial in our homes! By 10-12, I could not only cook up a little but was also aware of safety precautions with regard to heat and fire. We in our Indian kitchens have to deal with deep frying and shallow frying in direct fire. Also our cooking methods involve a lot of dry grinding, wet grinding of spices. Pressure cooking is integral with dals. As little girls we got introduced to cooking gradually by our grandma. It was the norm in those days. In my case, it was a must. This was because my mother was a working woman, a teacher, who had to leave home by morning 7.15. Same for Puja rituals. Mother also made sure every monday evening and thursday evening I washed out/mopped the entire puja room and did the kolam and got the puja ready for next day ritual early in the morning. Puja in those days was before she left for school. We little girls would be already bathed, dressed in school uniform and sitting in puja. After mother left for school, we had to learn our own lessons. Nobody taught us. I was also from under 10 years of age taught Sanskrit shlokas at home first and foremost by my mother who gave us annual assignment during the summer hols. The schedule was to get one sloka completely byheart. One stanza per day was the easy way we did it. That’s how I learnt many shlokas but have forgotten most now, having lost touch. I think my mother who lived a very short life did better parenting than me! Looking back, I am proud of the 13-14 year girl that I was when she left us forever. I was already resilient and responsible and dependable and more than all independent in most ways.

Cleaning as I cooked came naturally. When you lose your mother in your 13th year, you become the caretaker woman of the family. I didn’t realize that my home was suddenly disorderly until a guest commented that ours no longer looked good like when our mother was around. And that our clothes looked crumpled. That same evening I took my father to Viveks, an electronics shop in Mylapore, to get an iron box. Organizing things became the new routine. Filing documents also became an important matter. In my age, no other girl was handling so much including family finance or paying bills like I did. Most of my friends had not still stepped into their kitchens. I payed the taxes for my father, kept bank records and other things, cooked, cleaned the home even if we had a helper and in general continued the show. I think from my 9th standard I have been shopping for my undies, clothes, shoes, bags etc., by myself. Necessity is the mother of invention that’s all. Life’s special circumstances put us in the spot. My friends say they understand me better as they started losing their parents one by one to old age. Slowly they fell in line and became good task masters – adept at running homes, and juggling career as well as family. Its just that I started earlier. They had some free time in their teens.

Back to adult life. I see sometimes even some very good or perhaps greatest cooks/women who turn out awesome cuisines in their kitchens than me poorly manage their counters. I am by no means a foodie. I cook only what is absolutely basic and nothing exotic. But I would feel the urge to pick up the scrub and wipe the table and stove hobs of unkempt kitchens of my friends. Not that my house is 100% spic and span or that I live in a posh bungalow. Maximum my flat size is only 3 bedroom (in Chennai). But I like to keep it in order. Here in middle east in my absence, once a male friend of my hubby came to cook with him. It seems he exclaimed how I stored and what I stocked was too good. I kept everything to cook up a feast in my modest kitchen. I don’t have a Michelin star kitchen. Just recently fought a battle to install a small 3 unit Ikea kitchen counter replacing old one, after years of pleading with my tightfisted hubby! My stove is over a decade old here. But any good cook won’t get lost in my kitchen, that much I can guarantee. My appliances are also highly functional and handy. That man who cooked in my kitchen that day was kind of gourmet cook! In fact he later rang me to tell me and in fact congratulate me because he never expected me to have it all in that small space. He said my kitchen was very functional and user friendly. I knew I had a good kitchen. No designer storage jars for me. At least in Chennai i have a few Tupperware. Here most of the containers are old oats tins /nestle / pickle bottles etc., transformed into kitchen storage containers! A few original jars have been acquired during sale only strictly! Middle class stories! But I take it as a great compliment to be told that my kitchen is very organized and stocked thoughtfully. Nothing fancy. I don’t bake or do laddus and jalebis. Only fundamental daily nutritious south Indian cooking. Not a thing extra.

Really feels good to know that people who clean as they cook are planners and executors for long term.

Here is this from Google:

Psychology says people who clean as they cook instead of leaving everything for the end display these 8 distinctive traits consistently

  • Micro-control in the middle of chaos. …
  • Future self protectors. …
  • Quiet anxiety managers. …
  • The “good enough” perfectionists. …
  • The “one-touch” thinkers.

May be it sounds like boasting but I realize that this description fits me aptly. Once a while I guess we can accept compliments.

Its alright to live in small 2 bhk homes. I have never lived in huge spacious homes for the simple reason that we prefer living downtown everywhere. I have also come across star rating worthy kitchens where the women of the family DO NOT OR CANNOT COOK leaving matters to their paid chefs. I would hate to do that. Of late I am asking my househelp to chip in in Chennai as age catches up with me apart from tight engagements. Also cooking from your pre teens seems to affect me peculiarly these days. It seems suddenly too boring. Yet, at times I return to my kitchen there. I have the luxury of help in my Chennai kitchen only in last few years. Otherwise I never imagined that one day I would be permitting anyone to touch my kitchen hob or handle my pots and pans. So possessive about them normally! Anyway, I think even if you have an appointed cook, the woman of the house being able to cook up for family and guests is kind of unwritten code in our families. A 5 star kitchen to me is worthless if the woman of the house has not cooked up hearty meals there for the family. I am happy with my small one even if I am by no means a foodie or gourmet chef. Just a regular housewife/mother/grandma here who would like to tap the best out of my kitchen.

2000% UTILITY VALUE – that is how I would like to describe my kitchen! Well used! By utility value, I don’t mean the usage of my kitchen by a cook/chef. My kitchen is mine first, to cook up hot spicy and heartwarming meals for my family. Whatever they may ask for even in the dead of the night, I must be able to cook for them with my own hands. That way my kitchen is not only well provided for, but also well utilized.

We say, Ma Lakshmi lives in our kitchen fires, stove, hobs. Anna Purna is our Divine Mother who gives us food. To keep the kitchen clean and organized is our duty. Wherever kitchen is not maintained, I used to notice that even their bathrooms won’t be clean. Clutter would be everywhere. Even the lives of such persons, in my view, are chaotic and disorganized. And this thing about personal hygiene. I better stop here. This I am saying without prejudice. In fact the persons may even look disheveled with not-so-crisp dressing sense. That dishevelment would be the byline about them in every area of life. Strictly on firsthand experiences dealing with this kind that I am making this statement. Most of us avoid making personal comments on disorganized people. Our well wishes are not met with approval. I realize we are not here to advise or reform anyone.

The problem is, because of our discipline, some of us get labeled as OCD cases. We can’t fit in anywhere. We get disappointed in people. We are thought of as snobbish and unfriendly (which could be true)! I go check bathrooms everywhere first and a couple of my friends poke fun of me for this obsession of mine about bathroom cleanliness. Bathrooms can be old, tiles and fittings can be old, but they must be functional and clean. I live in a 25 year old flat presently where even the plumbing is not concealed. You think these things are not connected but everything is connected in my opinion.

My engineer husband who heads projects says, he sequences the projects first in his head – like he says, we should not build the superstructure before we build the basements. There is always an order of things to follow so that you don’t end up doubling back. Same holds true of your kitchen too. In my mental map, I always store what I need to procure by way of groceries/provisions for the week or month as well as supplies such as detergents etc. I don’t need to jot down anything in a memo. I also plan a week’s menu in my head and shop accordingly. I see to that I cover all veggies in rotation over a period of time and try out different dishes with least repeats in any given short frame of time.

How to save on cooking time? All of us ladies plan our menus mentally for a week at least. I am ahead by nearly 10-15 days with my planning as most south Indian ladies are. This is because we grind the staple idli batter to everything and keep spices for ready use. Say sambhar powder or rasam powder for instance. All these we keep handy for which we plan months ahead. Not all are storebought in our homes. Then if I have to use a blender in cooking twice or thrice on a particular day, I plan the sequence in my head as well. For instance dry blending must always precede any wet grinding so that the jar stays dry for wet grinding later.Soakings must be done the previous night – for instance for channa. Its no rocket science. Just a thoughtful sequencing that’s all. Similarly we have to plan in decide on the kadai or pan/pot usage. Which to use. This is especially useful on days when we have to cook for pujas or for guests. Sequencing saves time. Of course this comes with age and experience – with practice, as simple as that.

Cooking is not gender-based responsibility. I am sorry if I have conveyed such a thought. I have a son in his early 30s who is cooking delicious meals for his 4 year daughter. Yet I don’t want to mince words when it comes to mentioning about the natural nurturing instincts that women are born with. A woman who cannot cook or is a poor cook may not have a happy married life or family life or great home. Goes without saying. Superficial people please excuse. We do have politically correct people who keep up appearances everywhere and always. I*I am no feminist. Alright call me sexist and I don’t care. Start looking around: you will find glaring examples. Its just that a kitchen is a warm place to keep the family content and united. Its THE place to start with.

Cooking means self sufficiency. Cooking is a skill. Its nothing to be ashamed of. Its healthy lifestyle. In fact eating homefood is what is luxury, not eating in 5 star restaurant. Having a clutter free home and kitchen, and clean bathrooms is basic and fundamental discipline. You organize your home, your life is organized.

For me, cooking naturally also means prior planning, planning in advance by weeks, even months at times like when we arrange for pickles, papads, jams etc., everything homemade, staying alert as to what is low stock, what needs top up, etc., that that becomes the way you function in every department of your life. You carry the discipline to whatever you do, wherever you go.

Today I have in my life , girl cousins and nieces who all could qualify for master chefs! Some of them are also professionals managing both home including kitchen and their hifi careers skillfully. Kudos to these remarkable women!

********************************

Anyways, big hug to whoever made me reflect on my kitchen habits. I feel good about myself honestly. For me, cooking is essentially for feeding my beloved ones. Recently the help I have here had moist eyes when I asked her whether she had eaten. She comes to me after having her lunch by 3 pm. She said, nobody ever fusses over food with her like I do. She still hasn’t had anything with me, yet me asking her to have at least a chai or coffee seems to move her. At the back of our mind, we mothers always keep worrying whether someone has had food. My son tells me, how I keep irritating him asking every single time whether he has had food. Indian mothers. What else do you expect of me.

Posted in Pictures Foreign

Mufasa: the lion king.

Watched the super animation flick during the 14 hour nonstop from the US to Doha as a lone traveler. It drew the attention of my next seat neighbour who gave me unbelieving looks! Well, I love children’s pictures. Loved watching ‘flow’ and ‘frozen’ with my granddaughter. Wanted to watch Moana too but my granddaughter is scared of Moana’s dad so said a big ‘NO.’ However the 3.5 year old can croon to most songs especially the Moana one (along with the Frozen) and I love watching the video of this sweet song that has captured my little one’s heart! Thanks to her I am getting aware of latest children’s pictures to which I am getting addicted! Leaving out the Lord of Rings and Harry Potter, I watch the rest made for kids. My son grew up watching Lion King with us parents who were also mesmerized by the Bug life etc., over 25 years back. Now its my granddaughter’s turn to lure me into amazing pictures made for kids! I loved the Frozen. The Flow, runaway academy award winner over Disney’s colossal blockbusters, rooted me to the couch in amazement. Never watched anything like that before. And you have to watch it with a toddler or a kid under 5! Missed Mufasa that my granddaughter watched in the cinemas with her dad. Thank god, I caught up with Mufasa on the flight! Loved every minute of that. The prequel was not only justifying, it was equally captivating. That it did not end up as disappointment, rather proved to be so enthralling is wonderful. Mufasa, Sarabi, Simba are part of all our families! Moana 2 was also there for in the selection in the flight menu that I gave a miss. Waiting to watch Moana 1 with my granddaughter first next year!

how my 3.5 yr granddaughter sings Moana! she made this my favourite one too!
Posted in Economic, Socio-Political

Why small families are good for the nation.

Disclaimer: Before writing on this, I would like to state here that I am against no particular community or individual. I am merely stating this from the point of view of India, the most populous nation in the world with 1.4 billion to feed. We are all entitled to our perceptions.

*****************************

A Kerala friend who is a meat eating Hindu was telling me how as a small family they need to suffer. There are ports/sea coasts/backwaters in Kerala where you can get freshest catch of fish, just about to be frozen. This is that very morning’s catch mostly. There are markets where the meat is freshest and not frozen. The friend lives with her husband and two adult children. Whenever she goes for getting meat or fish in the market especially on sundays, says she, she can’t get good deals because, there are some ‘peaceful’ families with 5-6 kids who want the meaty (pun intended) portion for themselves. With adults such as parents, grandparents in typical joint family system, the size of these families may come to 10 or 12 or more. What happens in that event? Even if my friend who is nuclear family has the resources to pay for HER cut of meat/fish, she is DENIED that little legitimate portion of hers because, there are bulk buyers for the fresh meat and fish. Huge families with 10-12 members and half a dozen children, pay up and take the best cut. My friend is left to crumbles. Says she, this is the plight of all Hindus left to the leftovers even if we can pay fair price for what we want. The sellers in the markets naturally want to close a single big deal and wind up. Half a dozen or a dozen of big families of peacefuls take everything leaving literally nothing to smallest families other than crumbs. Big families buy from markets the way restaurants may shop for their daily groceries/meat: wholesale. She was happiest during the demonetization drive because the big buyers did not have the usual 500 rupee note bundles to pay cash and lift the fish basket right from the fishermen. It was the only time she says she ever got a fair deal competing with big buyers, as a middle class wife.

So the questions we have here may be:

  • Just by sheer size of family should one be entitled to larger portions of consumption?
  • Take the case of precious resources such as water. A family with half a dozen kids uses far more water than a family with 2 kids. Even if the bigger family may be able to pay the bills, is that even fair? With extra consumption of water, the bigger family is raising the rate/price of water for small families as well. Over consumption can lead to shortage for everyone. So how should one distribute resources in that case? Both a family with 2 kids and a family with 6 kids, let us say, can only receive 10 buckets of water per day. Its left upto you how you manage the water usage. The reason that the bigger and richer family can afford to pay is IMMATERIAL. The small families and the lower middle class families can still afford to pay their fair bills, provided artificial scarcity for water is NOT created by the big unfair consumers pushing up rates. I think this is how societies must function to ensure social justice to everyone. Everyone should have an equal stake in the pie.
  • This same rule about consumption of water also applies to electricity, gas and other resources that we all pay and use for making our lives better. Suppose someone is earning monthly salary of 100,000 rupees and another one earning mere 10,000 rupees every month. What gives the wrong sense of entitlement to the richer guy to imagine that he can use more of water or electricity or gas than the poorer guy when both are willing to foot reasonable bills for modest/rational consumptions of resources.
  • Suppose the kids of the 6 kid family are doing great in academics. Why should 6 kids from one family be allowed entry to elite institutions in the country with scarce resources denying others their spots. Even if the small families may produce mediocre kids, still their 2 kids must be able to win a merit place in universities, competing with the 6 kid family.
  • The impact of larger families on real estate is horrendous. Suppose the 6 kids buy properties in the city on growing up. Unnecessarily the real estate prices shoot up for everyone. The smaller families have to cough up astronomical prices, the result of a needless competition.
  • Only the sky and air and sunlight and moonlight are free for consumption for all family sizes. Rest are all chargeable.
  • Its wrong sense of entitlement on the part of bigger or richer families to assume that if they have the economic capacity to buy something, they can take possession.

Hindus with small families of 1-2 kids mostly and rarely a third kid therefore face unfair deals everywhere. We are a declining population today – increasing at a decreasing rate. We are losing out to the population j*h*d. This is the sordid truth.

Land ceiling was introduced in India in the early ’70s when most of the wealthier/landed families gave up their real estates voluntarily for redistribution to small/marginal farmers, rural artisans, and urban poor and the landless. The next land ceiling act is long overdue in India. Amassing of wealth started right after the 70s once again. We need one more correction very badly in current times to ensure that everyone has a toehold in the metro cities and not just the old rich or the new flashy rich. A similar act for family planning will also go a long way in preventing the over exploitation of resources by select few who can buy out anything and everything with their economic capacity. Those of us Hindus with limited family size feel cheated at the end of the day.

Google BHOODAN MOVEMENT and Acharya Vinoba Bhave who campaigned the movement. Bhoodan means ‘land donation.’ It was a nonviolent, bloodless movement when the landed gentry came forward voluntarily to donate land to the landless in the country. Vinoba ji was Gandhiji’s disciple who followed in his footsteps. He ushered in a revolution in the country which is unparalleled in world/Indian history thanks to which the rural population in India have a chance.

Some snippets from Google:

What is the significance of Bhoodan Andolan in agriculture sector in India?

The Bhoodan Andolan was the brainchild of (Vinoba) Bhave who wanted to redistribute land from landlords and wealthy zamindars to landless agricultural labourers. Bhave hoped that these labourers would be able to use this new land to practice subsistence cultivation and empower themselves

The Bhoodan movement successfully collected over 4 million acres of land through voluntary donations, with some of it being distributed to landless families. It raised awareness about the issues of landlessness and inspired discussions on land reforms in India.

***************************************

For me, a strong believer in social justice but not necessarily a Marxist/communist, limited natural/manmade resources must be distributed free and fair that everyone stands to benefit from them and nobody is excluded from enjoying what is their birthright.